[Morsaw]

My leg was itching like f*ck so I grabbed the first thing that I saw to scratch it. I wasn`t reallly paying attention due to the irritation of the itch, and unfortunately for me, I grabbed a razer. It was only a few seconds later that I started to see my legs bleeding that I realized my mistake. Oh god... Why?

[Xcommunicated]

QUOTE (AlexGTAGamer @ Thursday, Aug 9 2012, 16:55)

There was a football game taking place (this was back in my Primary school years) and the ball rolled down to the centre of the pitch whilst the teams were talking over a dispute. I saw the ball roll to the centre and I decided to run over to it and boot it back up the pitch, bad decision. Instead of kicking the ball I missed my footing and stomped my foot on top of the ball which rolled away leading my foot to smack the ground flat on its side - in short I twisted my ankle, badly. My foot was badly injured, and so was my pride for cocking up such a simple move. And that's not the first time I've twisted my ankle by missing my footing when it comes to kicking a ball, and it's because of that that I don't play footie anymore.

I had a lot of bad experiences with what we call "soccer" growing up, except they weren't necessarily all bad for me, just embarrassing. For no good reason I felt the urge to kick the ball at a kid's face when he wasn't paying attention. I broke his glasses and his nose and he fell to the ground crying.

Then a couple years later when I was in 8th grade I shoulder-plowed the sh*t out of some kid and knocked his ass out cold. He didn't get back up for like five minutes and had a concussion. Basically I got thrown off the team after that and never played soccer again, thank f*ck.

[Mr.Mister]

Whats with all the bad shaving stories? I use just a shaving blade in the shower and sweep it around my balls and I have never gotten a single cut. I hate shaving my chin, always cutting myself there.

[Ferocious Banger]

QUOTE (Triple Penetration @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 01:53)

QUOTE (Chunkyman @ Thursday, Aug 9 2012, 20:18) QUOTE (Gareth Croke @ Thursday, Aug 9 2012, 19:37) I once used Veet hair removal cream on my sack and crack to get rid of the hair... should have read the packet. Lol what happened? I once swallowed a poisonous berry by accident, and after coughing it out I spent the next 10 minutes dry heaving because of the horrible taste in my mouth. Yeah, I also would like to know what happened. BTW, You were lucky to get it out. I once put a half eaten apple in my mouth so I could run down the stairs faster (instead of holding the apple in my hand). It was a huge mistake, my parents tried to cut out the front part of the apple with a fork (it got stuck in my neck) and I had to go to hospital for surgery to take the apple out. I was there for 2 weeks.

Had there been three apples, it would have fit your usernamw perfectly xD

[zoo3891]

I once tried to remove something from the inside of an electrical outlet with a screwdriver, there was an arc flash, but thankfully nothing died/burned/was shocked. I tried asking a question about it in the "have a question topic" but nobody answered.

Another time I decided to try using peanut oil for something on my skin, and it left a smell for about half a month. Didn't come off with soap, or even vinegar.

[Jimmy_Leppard]

Well, I did and I'm still doing quite a lot stupid, but challenging stuff even though I'm not a minor anymore.

Couple of years ago when I was around 14, me and my pal who I have known for over 10 years now got to the town's official football club when it was empty. It was couple of hours before the ''big game''. So, we got into the home and away teams dressing rooms and sprayed the whole rooms with water. Since there were home teams' club shirts hanging all dry and ready for the home team players to wear them for the game, we sprayed a lot of water on the shirts aswell and walked away from the ''crime scene'' like a boss. To conclude, the game was postponed for like 3 hours until they cleaned the mess up. The home team also played in the shirts they came to the game cause there weren't extra shirts for them to wear.

Another thing I did with the same pal which takes the second place is a little funnier stunt. We got to his home, opened up Microsoft Word and typed ''HOUSE FOR SALE'' on the top of the paper and neighbour's phone number right under it. We printed that and glued the note to his fence. Let's say he got a lot of calls that day.

The third place takes something pretty stupid, but funny as sh*t. Me and 3 of my other pals went to McDonalds drive in one night. 2 of them can eat lots of that stuff, so after we ordered and ate all the things we ordered, we had 2 full bags of McDonalds' empty boxes of burgers, fries and all other sh*t, so we decided to dump it somewhere. Anyway, long story short, we drove couple of miles down the street to some hood where nobody can recognize us and hanged the 2 bags on 2 of the gate door knobs while in a moving car. We came by the next night to check if the bags were there and they weren't, so we did this stunt again the same night and we kept doing that for about 2 straight weeks to the same gate door knobs. Eventually, one night, the people from those 2 houses were outside waiting for us, but we just rolled by that street then and never got caught

[_____]

QUOTE (Mr.Mister @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 08:10)

Whats with all the bad shaving stories? I use just a shaving blade in the shower and sweep it around my balls and I have never gotten a single cut. I hate shaving my chin, always cutting myself there.

I used to do that too and rarely ever cut myself. I cut myself too quite frequently while I shave my facial hair, usually because I hurry.

QUOTE (zoo3891 @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 11:29)

I once tried to remove something from the inside of an electrical outlet with a screwdriver, there was an arc flash, but thankfully nothing died/burned/was shocked. I tried asking a question about it in the "have a question topic" but nobody answered.

I have a bad history with electrical stuff. I even used to have nightmares about it. I electrocuted myself over five times now, but one time it was really really bad. Let's just say I plugged something in an outlet that had the positive and negative tied. I didn't know much about electrics back then so I plugged that stuff in and basically electrocuted myself for a few seconds until the fuse blew. I think I almost died that time because my heart was beating so fast and I could barely breathe for a minute or so. Just so you know, the voltage in our country is 230 V, which is apparently enough to kill you.

Nonetheless, I got electrocuted many times directly to wires with full 230V, I haven't died yet fortunately.


Other stories include me being kind of creepy to other girls, one from last year in particular. I didn't even talk to her actually but she avoids me now for some reason, it makes me feel bad.

[TheGreatGig23]

QUOTE (GTA_stu @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 01:29)

I cleaned my balls using some warm water and stuffed the underpants into a smokey bacon crisp packet and shoved them into the bottom of my bin.

This has to be one of the best sentences ever posted in this place.

As for my testicular misadventures, it was when I was about 17. Me and my girlfriend were pretty open with other people sexually so one night we went to the house of a friend planning to have a threesome. The one condition of the other girl involved was that I shaved myself completely. She wasn't a fan of body hair, you see. I had no problem with this but I couldn't be bothered to f*ck about with the shaving so she suggested I use her Veet or something like it. As I had no idea what I was doing I persuaded the girls to do it for me. This was insanely fun and we had a good time until I realised that something felt a bit odd. I finished my joint and downed my beer, readying myself for the shower. Suddenly, it felt as if someone had started a fire between my crotch. I bolted up the stairs, into the bathroom, and started running the shower. With my luck being as sh*tty as it is, the shower was stupidly f*cking complicated and was set to "Molten Lava". Desperate to get this awful stuff off my balls I rinsed it all away in excruciating agony. I filled the sink with cold water and promptly soaked my nethers in it's cooled glory.

Never in my life have I learnt a lesson so valuable.

[Ferocious Banger]

QUOTE (Jimmy_Leppard @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 15:29)

Well, I did and I'm still doing quite a lot stupid, but challenging stuff even though I'm not a minor anymore. Couple of years ago when I was around 14, me and my pal who I have known for over 10 years now got to the town's official football club when it was empty. It was couple of hours before the ''big game''. So, we got into the home and away teams dressing rooms and sprayed the whole rooms with water. Since there were home teams' club shirts hanging all dry and ready for the home team players to wear them for the game, we sprayed a lot of water on the shirts aswell and walked away from the ''crime scene'' like a boss. To conclude, the game was postponed for like 3 hours until they cleaned the mess up. The home team also played in the shirts they came to the game cause there weren't extra shirts for them to wear. Another thing I did with the same pal which takes the second place is a little funnier stunt. We got to his home, opened up Microsoft Word and typed ''HOUSE FOR SALE'' on the top of the paper and neighbour's phone number right under it. We printed that and glued the note to his fence. Let's say he got a lot of calls that day. The third place takes something pretty stupid, but funny as sh*t. Me and 3 of my other pals went to McDonalds drive in one night. 2 of them can eat lots of that stuff, so after we ordered and ate all the things we ordered, we had 2 full bags of McDonalds' empty boxes of burgers, fries and all other sh*t, so we decided to dump it somewhere. Anyway, long story short, we drove couple of miles down the street to some hood where nobody can recognize us and hanged the 2 bags on 2 of the gate door knobs while in a moving car. We came by the next night to check if the bags were there and they weren't, so we did this stunt again the same night and we kept doing that for about 2 straight weeks to the same gate door knobs. Eventually, one night, the people from those 2 houses were outside waiting for us, but we just rolled by that street then and never got caught

Epic stories are epic! :^<

[Ferocious Banger]

QUOTE (TheGreatGig23 @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 16:26)

QUOTE (GTA_stu @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 01:29) I cleaned my balls using some warm water and stuffed the underpants into a smokey bacon crisp packet and shoved them into the bottom of my bin. This has to be one of the best sentences ever posted in this place. As for my testicular misadventures, it was when I was about 17. Me and my girlfriend were pretty open with other people sexually so one night we went to the house of a friend planning to have a threesome. The one condition of the other girl involved was that I shaved myself completely. She wasn't a fan of body hair, you see. I had no problem with this but I couldn't be bothered to f*ck about with the shaving so she suggested I use her Veet or something like it. As I had no idea what I was doing I persuaded the girls to do it for me. This was insanely fun and we had a good time until I realised that something felt a bit odd. I finished my joint and downed my beer, readying myself for the shower. Suddenly, it felt as if someone had started a fire between my crotch. I bolted up the stairs, into the bathroom, and started running the shower. With my luck being as sh*tty as it is, the shower was stupidly f*cking complicated and was set to "Molten Lava". Desperate to get this awful stuff off my balls I rinsed it all away in excruciating agony. I filled the sink with cold water and promptly soaked my nethers in it's cooled glory. Never in my life have I learnt a lesson so valuable.

I literally Laughed Out Loud! Great lesson learned!

[guib]

When I do something stupid, it is always awkward and most of the time not even funny.

For instance, the teacher once ask me to go get something for an experiment, so I go downstairs and meet another teacher which I say "hi" to, and when i got downstairs, I forgot what I had to go get, so the concierge goes ask my teacher infront of the whole class and everybody just laughed at me.
I felt so humiliated that I completely froze down, I didn't speak for days at school. (and still don't talk much in front of people who are not my family)

And thanks to this (and more experiences like this) I am now still shy and easily embarrassed.

[NateShaw92]

QUOTE (guib @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 13:22)

When I do something stupid, it is always awkward and most of the time not even funny. For instance, the teacher once ask me to go get something for an experiment, so I go downstairs and meet another teacher which I say "hi" to, and when i got downstairs, I forgot what I had to go get, so the concierge goes ask my teacher infront of the whole class and everybody just laughed at me. I felt so humiliated that I completely froze down, I didn't speak for days at school. (and still don't talk much in front of people who are not my family) And thanks to this (and more experiences like this) I am now still shy and easily embarrassed.

everyone here is human, except the spambots, we all make mistakes (even the spambots) secret is to just laugh it off, much easier in retrospect of a mistake, jsut laugh it off, brush yourself off and say "how do" to the world. Regret solves nothing, acceptence and, for mistlkes liek this, looking back and laughing is one of the surest ways to happiness my friend

anyway OT
I was playing indoor football in a PE lesson, as a golakeeper and kicking ass, at the end of the game I am under the rame ofht goal, right under the crossbar, squatted obviously, and I stand up (or try to) to walk off, and my mate was like "Flynny watch-" *DONG* I stood up and whacked the op of my head on the underside of the crossbar, hard enough to lift the goal up about a centimetre. I honestly don't know if I hurt the crossbar more than it hurt me

[top gear]

Once when I was 12 I tried to punch my friend somehow but I have no f*cking clue how but I hit him ON THE ASS. One of the most embarrasing moments of my entire life.

However when I was 8 after class in school I went to have a wee. Since I had seen so many grow ups do it I decided to use the urinal, I opened my trouser zip and midway through peeing my dick went back into the trousers and as you know it is impossible to stop peeing midway through so I totally pissed myself. And of course everyone in my class had to remind this horrible day for me for the next 3 years by giving me a nickname Pissu. How lovely.

[Ferocious Banger]

^ Lol..your gear stick down-shifted automatically

[Jimmy_Leppard]

QUOTE (top gear @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 14:59)

Once when I was 12 I tried to punch my friend somehow but I have no f*cking clue how but I hit him ON THE ASS. One of the most embarrasing moments of my entire life.

You should've made a joke about it

[DeeperRed]

Went to kick a football, stood on it instead, feel backwards as well as pulling my groin muscle.

Sports is certainly not my forte.

[MIKON8ERISBACK]

A while ago I was really pissed off about something and I decided to vent my rage by using the legs of a chair to smash up a spare fish aquarium (that wasn't being used and had no water it obviously). One of the four plates of glass was smashed into a million pieces on account that it was the special "tempered" type, although remarkably resilient against previous beatings. Millions of pieces immediately poured onto the ground of the basement.

It generated a near deafening shattering noise and the sounds of the small pieces of tempered glass could be heard twinkling and sparkling in a manner identical to something out of a cartoon. I later used the shop-vac to clean them up thoroughly.

The backgrounds of what caused me to get so pissed off are technical in nature and no one who isn't an electrician or tech savvy individual would understand.

[Method]

I went to search some girls name on Facebook but accidentally posted it as my status instead.

I know thats not very big but I still thought it was awful, haha.

[MIKON8ERISBACK]

QUOTE (_____ @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 05:20)

QUOTE (Mr.Mister @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 08:10) Whats with all the bad shaving stories? I use just a shaving blade in the shower and sweep it around my balls and I have never gotten a single cut. I hate shaving my chin, always cutting myself there. I used to do that too and rarely ever cut myself. I cut myself too quite frequently while I shave my facial hair, usually because I hurry. QUOTE (zoo3891 @ Friday, Aug 10 2012, 11:29) I once tried to remove something from the inside of an electrical outlet with a screwdriver, there was an arc flash, but thankfully nothing died/burned/was shocked. I tried asking a question about it in the "have a question topic" but nobody answered. I have a bad history with electrical stuff. I even used to have nightmares about it. I electrocuted myself over five times now, but one time it was really really bad. Let's just say I plugged something in an outlet that had the positive and negative tied. I didn't know much about electrics back then so I plugged that stuff in and basically electrocuted myself for a few seconds until the fuse blew. I think I almost died that time because my heart was beating so fast and I could barely breathe for a minute or so. Just so you know, the voltage in our country is 230 V, which is apparently enough to kill you. Nonetheless, I got electrocuted many times directly to wires with full 230V, I haven't died yet fortunately. Other stories include me being kind of creepy to other girls, one from last year in particular. I didn't even talk to her actually but she avoids me now for some reason, it makes me feel bad.

120 volts (North America) is enough to cause death. I don't mean to be a douche, but with alternating current (used with household power) the live wire relative to the neutral (return path for normal voltage) actually changes between the positive and negative phase a set number of times each second. In Europe, the standard is 50 Hertz, which equates to 100 cycles each second.

As for the "electrocution" part; even as little as 12 volts AC or DC can kill you if enough amps can flow through you. The amps that flow through you are dependent on the power supply itself and your body's resistance, which is at it's lowest when your wet. Generally speaking, the resistance in humans has a tendency to go down as the voltage is increased, although this is dependent on a number of other factors.

Electrocution is electric shock that results in death, whereas an electric shock that doesn't result in death is just an "electric shock".

I could go on for much longer about this subject, but it's already off topic as it is. Electrical safety is one of my top concerns.

[_____]

I didn't know about that difference. However, resistance is proportional to potential difference (voltage) so I don't know how what you said makes any sense.