[Chunkyman]

I avoid this problem by strategically never talking to girls.

[Gtaman_92]

i never really been in a friend zone but back in high school there was at least two chicks who wanted me in my 11 grade year but at the time i was not into that girls. Right now i wish i could of talk and build a relationship with them cuz being single sucks. where i live there are VERY few girls who are single, it seems like most of them get boyfriends for the hell of it and i just hate that sh*t.

[Djdevin10]

Hold on let me light a cigarillo, cuz this is a topic i relate too.

Ok, it all started in 7th grade. Me and my best friend went to drama club to pick up girls. Then i saw J. J was a short girl, crooked teeth, but she was beautiful(well at the time, now she's scene), and she was just nice to me. So fast forward two weeks, after going to drama for a while, we just started hanging out till her mom came to pick her up. I listened to EVERY word she said(TBH i still remember a majority of it), and then one day i asked her if she was single. SHe said, oh no i'm dating this one guy, Cody. She said sorry, and we continued to be friends. I always got interested when she would become single, but she would just laugh it off. In 8th grade, i asked her to the winter formal, but she said no because she wanted to go by her self. Then one of my firends asked her, and she said yes, so i got the message and forgot about her.(Now that i think about it she was a complete bitch.)

Before i asked her to the winter banquet, i liked one of her friends, named C. C was a fun girl to be around, we always hang out at my house, or before school we would play Just Dance 2. Then one day i woke up, and realized, holy sh*t i like C. So i just hung out with her more, and then one day while we was at the park she asked me who i liked. I told her and she just said aww that's cute, and gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek, and when we walked home i held her hand. SO i was like oh sh*t, i might actually get with her. So i ask her out, but she said that she's gonna try to work things out with her ex bf who's a douche(who also dated J when i liked her). So it didn't work out, and i hung out with her again. Then this 15 year old kid asked her out and she said yes. I asked her what about us, and she said she didn't like me like that. So i gradually stopped talking to her.(She's still with that kid).

After the Banquet, i started hanging out with kids who partied. Before that though, i meet one of my (now) close friends R. So anyway, i started hanging out with T, and she was fun to, and we just chilled after school, with R and some other friends. SO the week before graduation i hung out with R, T, and 2 other friends. We hung out for a long ass time. THen i was like f*ck it, and i asked out T. She said IDK, i have to think about it. SO i was like alright, and left. After walking for a little bit, i realized i forgot my backpack there. Then i saw R kissing T. SO i just got my sh*t and i dipped. I was PISSED at R, and he kept on trying to make it up to me, but i didn't forgive him. Then a couple hours before graduation, he came up to me said sorry, and said he broke up with her. SO i Forgave him Afer i punched him in the face of course.

Then there is V. V is this girl i met around the time i met J. I liked her at first, and asked her out, and she said no, so i just forgot about it. Then IDK why, i just started liking her agian this year. SO i talked to her more, and she just always wanted to hang out, and was so nice to me. So i ask her to the Formal, and she said Yes. I was just happy as f*ck, and was bragging to R about it, and he said bro she's a bitch. The week before though she said she got in trouble, and she couldn't go. SO i decided was gonna hang out with R the night before, and hang out all day Sat, then he was gonna have a date night with his current girl. So a couple days before Formal, she texted me, i can go, but Z asked me, and i'm going with him, but we can go to the movies or some thing. I was just like o ok. I didn't really care. I wasn't mad or anything ( I only get mad at big sh*t like some one f*cking me over). Then i texted R and told him and he got pissed, and told her off. She got mad at me for it and stopped talking to me. So the night before R got in trouble, and couldn't go out on his date with his girl, so he went to my house. At about 9ish, we snuck out so he can met up with her anyway. Now , R's girlfriend, Ce, is bff's with V, so V comes along. At first it was awkward(She decided not to go cuz she felt bad.) So we go to Ce's house, and they went upstairs to f*ck. So me and V just started playing Just Dance 3 and had hella fun, and just chilled out, and she got over it. So about 2-3 weeks later, i spend the night at Ce's house because my mom left, and i could spend the night anywhere. The second day i was there, her sisters BF bought some weed, and me and him smoked. THen V came over. When i saw her i said "DAAAAAMMMMNNNN" and she smiled cuz she knew i was high. Ao i just chilled out ate some popcorn, and chilled. Then, she was leaning in to kiss me(she knows i never had my first kiss), and i tried to kiss her back. THen she said D, i thought we were just friends. She kept on doing that sh*t to f*ck with me, and she got MAD at me, cuz i tried to kiss her. She got pissed and didn't talk to me for a while. I was just, i liked her EVEN after that. SO i texted CE, and aske her what to do. She was just like D, she's your biggest crush, but you just got to let her go she's a bitch. A week after that i just was like, wow she IS a bitch, and just lost all feelings for her.

And now i like N, but CE, V, and R said i shouldn't go after her, but i like her anyway, and i think i know how this story is gonna end.




If you aren't bothered to read the entire story, just know that the friend zone f*cking sucks.

[Wreckless Jake]

"Friend-zone" is how we vilify a woman for exercising her right to say "no" and it's stupid, once they say no get the hell out of there. But then again, if you played your cards in the first right you wouldn't be in this situation!

Also, best piece of advice I ever had back when I had only shagged two girls and my second had f*cked me over for being a push over was "treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen". And no that doesen't mean be a c*nt and actually treat them like sh*t, it just means don't be up their arse telling them how beautiful she is or anything and being clingy as f*ck all the time, tease her, playfully make fun of her, sometimes act like you're losing interest, keep 'em coming back for more. But I'm in a serious relationship now where feelings are involved

[EscoLehGo]

QUOTE (Wreckless Jake @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 12:30)

"Friend-zone" is how we vilify a woman for exercising her right to say "no" and it's stupid, once they say no get the hell out of there. But then again, if you played your cards in the first right you wouldn't be in this situation! Also, best piece of advice I ever had back when I had only shagged two girls and my second had f*cked me over for being a push over was "treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen". And no that doesen't mean be a c*nt and actually treat them like sh*t, it just means don't be up their arse telling them how beautiful she is or anything and being clingy as f*ck all the time, tease her, playfully make fun of her, sometimes act like you're losing interest, keep 'em coming back for more. But I'm in a serious relationship now where feelings are involved

This is partly true because I feel that the majority of the time the female encourages a friendship after the male has expressed his interest and she's turned him down. This leads the male to believe that if he sticks around and bothers her long enough then he'll find a way to eventually sneak into her cave and set up camp there. I think a lot of girls abuse the friend zone so they can feel admired and sought after by someone, which is a natural thing but very selfish as well. There's a shared amount of guilt in the friend zone situation, the male is wrong for chasing poon around that he'll never get and is severely damaging his self worth, the female is guilty for encouraging this f*ckery and actively participating in this false friendship.

@devin, I kind of got lost in your story there with all the letters and what not but I gather that you're probably in high school or middle school. What you're experiencing now is only the tip of the iceberg my friend, the games they play get far worse in the future but it sounds like you're handling yourself well so far. Just don't chase these broads around, let them come to you. Be aloof and seemingly uncaring, that'll peak their interest, trust me.

[Sup3rman]

Great thread here, useful and a good way to share things.

I as many of you have had bad luck in the form of friend zone. I actually considered giving everything up and not talking to any girls or about girls or trying to hit on a girl then. Real emo stuff actually. I still remember those girls clearly and can talk about my experience with two of them.
I have never had any real luck with girls some odd way, altough i can make them smile and all. This one girl, that i started to like a few years ago, turned out to be a real f*cking bitch, i call her fat motherf*cker, sry for the expression, because thats what she is now. As i got her msn address i started talking to her. By msn she seemed real nice, she started calling me by sweet names and such, i really tought i had a chance finally. But the weird thing is that in public she like denied everything and was really mean in real life and with company. She like acted in msn. Then i found out she was sort of dating my best friend. Well i cant really remember much what happened next, but i guess for the angry stuff i said to her back she blocked me from everywhere, also my friend. So actually there was even no friendship there. Just a mean bitch.

The other girl is still a beautiful and adorable sweet girl who is a friend to me now unfortunatelly. Asi got to know her a few years ago i started to like her. For some reason there was then a year when i didnt even speak to her. Cant remember why. Anyway, at the end of last year i met her again at a graduation of a mjtual friend. And after that at a party. Now at that party i noticed that she was real sweet again with me and when we were a bit drunk allready and were sitting on a couch, she layed down on my lap or under my arm. From that i figured she maybe liked me too. That made me like her too and via msn we started speaking again. I tried to hit on her gently and then said i like her... Then came the words that were like axe to my heart: i just want to be friends.
That really hurt me and next time we were at her apartment i just acted miserable. I drank much vodka and after when we went to a store to by some more to drink i asked her again if i had any chance, at least some way with her, that id try to chance. But she still said that she wants to be friends.
And at her birthday when i was about to leave with my friend, the same one who is quite a ladiesman, i went looking for him. Found him and her making out at the bathroom. I just yelled lets go, full of anger and i think i punched some doors and pillars so hard that paint flew. But i guess they didnt notice it and i also kept it down. Im still very good friends with my buddy and just friends with the girl.

But for conclusion, friendzone really sucks. Its like a curse at least to me.

[TheGreatGig23]

QUOTE (Xcommunicated @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 03:17)

I believe men and women can't be friends if there is any attraction on either side and especially if either side is single. It doesn't work, and any male playing along in such a role needs a heavy dose of man the f*ck up.

With all due respect, this is bollocks. Utter bollocks.

I'm friends with many women who I find attractive and vice versa and have had sex with on occasions. We're still friends, there's no awkwardness and no one needs a dose of "man the f*ck up". My house-mate is a girl I started talking to purely on the basis of trying to get her into my bed. She had a boyfriend but I didn't care, she is a genuinely beautiful person who I want in my life regardless of her marital status or looks. She has often told me that had she not been in a relationship, things would be different. We're adults therefore we have what seems like a rare gift of talking about things. We've both told each other that we find each other attractive and yet we're still great friends. Your logic is flawed and it seems a tad 1950's. No offence, by the way. Just offering my opinion.

As for the friend-zone thing. My outlook is simple; don't put up with it. I've been there once or twice and both times I've told the girl how I feel and, depending on her reaction, it's either worked out or it hasn't. Simple as that. I never make it an awkward thing and I'm still friends with these girls. One of them ended up being my girlfriend for two years and moved to Manchester with me.

Personally, I think my dick is what guides me half the time. I don't really have a say in what goes on. While he's cool enough to freeze the devil, I am most certainly not. As other members have said, talking to women is a nightmare. I'm off to Benidorm tomorrow and hope to have replicated upon me the four-stroke pattern of suck, squeeze, bang, blow but, knowing my pathetic efforts, I'll end up in the scrap yard. Ok, sh*t metaphor, but you get my point.

[EscoLehGo]

QUOTE (TheGreatGig23 @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 15:13)

With all due respect, this is bollocks. Utter bollocks. I'm friends with many women who I find attractive and vice versa and have had sex with on occasions. We're still friends, there's no awkwardness and no one needs a dose of "man the f*ck up". My house-mate is a girl I started talking to purely on the basis of trying to get her into my bed. She had a boyfriend but I didn't care, she is a genuinely beautiful person who I want in my life regardless of her marital status or looks. She has often told me that had she not been in a relationship, things would be different. We're adults therefore we have what seems like a rare gift of talking about things. We've both told each other that we find each other attractive and yet we're still great friends. Your logic is flawed and it seems a tad 1950's. No offence, by the way. Just offering my opinion. As for the friend-zone thing. My outlook is simple; don't put up with it. I've been there once or twice and both times I've told the girl how I feel and, depending on her reaction, it's either worked out or it hasn't. Simple as that. I never make it an awkward thing and I'm still friends with these girls. One of them ended up being my girlfriend for two years and moved to Manchester with me. Personally, I think my dick is what guides me half the time. I don't really have a say in what goes on. While he's cool enough to freeze the devil, I am most certainly not. As other members have said, talking to women is a nightmare. I'm off to Benidorm tomorrow and hope to have replicated upon me the four-stroke pattern of suck, squeeze, bang, blow but, knowing my pathetic efforts, I'll end up in the scrap yard. Ok, sh*t metaphor, but you get my point.

That's a strange arrangement you've got going on there, so you live with a woman that you find sexually attractive and are friends with yet the two of you don't hook up, that's really odd to me. I wouldn't be able to handle a situation like that, it would eventually go to sh*t as I've mentioned several times before I'm a primitive ape-man when it comes to sex, I wouldn't be able to handle that temptation. Perhaps you're just more "evolved", I had a roommate once who was a hippy musician and he had several female friends who he had slept with that he would hang around with. It was such a bizarre scenario, I remember specifically he invited several girls he had slept with over for a Halloween/Walking Dead premiere party we threw and I was in awe of how they all harmonically got along, although things did get weird towards the end of the night/morning when he chose which one he was going to sleep with for the night. I remember vividly hearing one of the girls asking why she didn't get chosen after he had made his selection and headed to the bedroom, the whole situation still confuses me, I guess when you play the guitar things are different.

[TheGreatGig23]

QUOTE (EscoLehGo @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 16:41)

That's a strange arrangement you've got going on there, so you live with a woman that you find sexually attractive and are friends with yet the two of you don't hook up, that's really odd to me. I wouldn't be able to handle a situation like that, it would eventually go to sh*t as I've mentioned several times before I'm a primitive ape-man when it comes to sex, I wouldn't be able to handle that temptation. Perhaps you're just more "evolved", I had a roommate once who was a hippy musician and he had several female friends who he had slept with that he would hang around with. It was such a bizarre scenario, I remember specifically he invited several girls he had slept with over for a Halloween/Walking Dead premiere party we threw and I was in awe of how they all harmonically got along, although things did get weird towards the end of the night/morning when he chose which one he was going to sleep with for the night. I remember vividly hearing one of the girls asking why she didn't get chosen after he had made his selection and headed to the bedroom, the whole situation still confuses me, I guess when you play the guitar things are different.

From the outside looking in, it does seem a bit odd. The main reason we don't hook up is because she's got issues and I don't need that. She's very attractive and a nice person and I'm happy being her friend so I won't push for it to go any further. I agree that the temptation is a big thing and there have been a couple of drunken nights where she's invited me to bed but I've always said my goodnight's and gone to bed. It's not worth the aftermath, on her part that is.

We're equally evolved, you just have a different opinion and a different way of dealing with things. I completely get how things can be awkward and how you'd rather not bother with it. I just don't really see why I would miss out on knowing someone awesome simply because they won't f*ck me or whatever.

That bloke sounds like someone I know. He can charm the pants off any female within a five-mile radius. I'd love to have the opportunity in which I actually got to choose which woman to sleep with and then have the "losers" question why they weren't picked. And yes, the guitar is one hell of a good pant-removing tool

[jaysteels]

Well I'll put it short:

I'm 16 now, and I have been hopelessly in love with a girl since..... age 9 I think. And I've just never said anything cause of a certain fear of a certain outcome - Only the outcome could become disastrous. I don't stand a chance!

[Jay]

QUOTE (EscoLehGo @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 10:04)

bonezone

I can tell you with a huge amount of authority that as long as you say this word, girls will not want to sleep with you.

[EscoLehGo]

QUOTE (TheGreatGig23 @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 16:03)

From the outside looking in, it does seem a bit odd. The main reason we don't hook up is because she's got issues and I don't need that. She's very attractive and a nice person and I'm happy being her friend so I won't push for it to go any further. I agree that the temptation is a big thing and there have been a couple of drunken nights where she's invited me to bed but I've always said my goodnight's and gone to bed. It's not worth the aftermath, on her part that is. We're equally evolved, you just have a different opinion and a different way of dealing with things. I completely get how things can be awkward and how you'd rather not bother with it. I just don't really see why I would miss out on knowing someone awesome simply because they won't f*ck me or whatever. That bloke sounds like someone I know. He can charm the pants off any female within a five-mile radius. I'd love to have the opportunity in which I actually got to choose which woman to sleep with and then have the "losers" question why they weren't picked. And yes, the guitar is one hell of a good pant-removing tool

See, that's impressive to me that you can evaluate the situation and not sleep with her, I know myself well enough to know that I couldn't do that, at least not for long. My penis would take over my mind completely and I would eventually break the threshold, it took me a while to admit this to myself. It's kind of like how an alcoholic struggles with admitting their powerless to alcohol, I am powerless to my penis, it's such a burden. I can go from intelligent to caveman in seconds because of my penis.

And yes, that guy was a character, he got more ass than he knew what to do with and I still don't really know why. I mean he was a great guy but I didn't really understand the appeal he had with the ladies, his music was pretty mediocre and he was pretty much just a shaggy hippy but god damn if he didn't get loads of pussy.

He was so laid back about it too, I remember after one of his shows he had these two cute girls carrying his heavy ass equipment back to his car. He was like "You see that one carrying my guitar case, I'm f*cking her tonight." and he sure enough did. There were multiple times when he'd bring these girls in contact with each other and they all knew that they had slept with him, sometimes they'd even joke about it, man it was weird.

@Jay, lol it's a Delocated reference

[TheGreatGig23]

QUOTE (EscoLehGo @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 17:32)

See, that's impressive to me that you can evaluate the situation and not sleep with her, I know myself well enough to know that I couldn't do that, at least not for long. My penis would take over my mind completely and I would eventually break the threshold, it took me a while to admit this to myself. It's kind of like how an alcoholic struggles with admitting their powerless to alcohol, I am powerless to my penis, it's such a burden. I can go from intelligent to caveman in seconds because of my penis.

Haha I know what you mean, man. That has still happened to me a couple of times. I have a friend in Scotland who is basically a f*ck buddy of sorts. We're good friends but whenever we share a bed, we end up getting jiggy with it. I don't really have a say in that, it's my penis that does all the thinking at that point. Not that I mind, his thinking is sometimes genius. I'm in Benidorm for the weekend and I can guarantee that my penis will be doing all the thinking. Sometimes it's appropriate, sometimes it isn't. But most people, including women, get these moments and it's what can either lead to a great night out or a mistake that'll last you a lifetime.

[Jay]

Alright c*nts.

There's two types of friendzoning girls, the naive one, legitimately thinks you want to be friends, and the vindictive one, acknowledges your attention and exploits it.

Eliminate both. The only girls you should be friends with are those where you're mutually platonic. Well, as platonic as you can be. When you boil it all down, you have a penis, she has a vagina, and for whatever amount of reasons you cook up in your head, you both don't use them.

The only experience I've had with this is in highschool, and since then I've managed to pretty much cut it out of my life. It's like cancer. Currently the only girls I am friends with are girlfriends of my male friends, coworkers, girls I don't want to have sex with and friends of my girlfriend. I've somehow managed to friendzone girls in the past, so that means the universe has balanced out or some sh*t. That's 'nice guy logic', which is sh*t. Stop it.

Jake is onto something. There's no coincidence that there's a particular archetype of person that complains about the friend zone the most. And I have a particular beef with that type of person. And yes, that is the majority of people posting in this thread.

Lacking confidence, lacking interpersonal skills (especially with the women) and having varying levels of nonverbal communication screaming out these facts are basically crossing you right off the list of dateable dudes. And it starts early. There's a primal manner in which school kids engage in conversation between the sexes (this is what trip and Xcomm touched on) where they use one of two approaches. Act like dickbags if their confidence levels are high enough, act real nice otherwise. In a school situation, girls are shallow and conceited and respond mostly to the former.

This is where that whole 'nice guy' bullsh*t label gets affixed to the scorned sleeves like a badge of honour, and an excuse for their resulting behaviour.

You're not nice. You're f*ckwits. These 'jerks' may have been so when you were younger, but it was a foot in the door, and the socialisation and pussy it opened into their world allowed them to grow as people and become awesome. Confidence breeds confidence and for many aspects of life that is all you need. You know what else is self perpetuating? The brooding, "why me" attitudes that swirl around those that are 'friend zoned'.

Seeing this gets these nice guys angry. Angry enough to rationalise sh*t behaviour, if only to balance out the world. They've got all this saved up karma, after all. Chicks won't f*ck them and assholes slay poon. Being mean in every aspect of life except talking to girls that will eventually f*ck you when they realise that being nice is sexy is the way to go. Flawless logic, right?

Somewhere in between all of this they stumble into forum threads to bleat and moan, don't forget that. That's why white knighting exists, but that's another post.

This brings me to the best ever analogy I've ever found (vetted and approved by women - you'll find out one day when you have these frank and awesome discussions with them when you're not trying to dive into their pants and wonder why they don't like you)... women are not vending machines where you can put niceness coins in and sex comes out.

You do nice things for your male friends and don't get in a huff when they don't suck your dick. What exactly is the difference here? Entitlement. You're entitled. You're f*ckbags and you think you're entitled to sex or relationships just because you were nice and friendly to someone with two X chromosomes. Excuse me for not giving you a standing ovation.

You know what entitles you to a relationship? Mutual attraction and giving her a reason to like you beyond being a nice guy. There's a reason the term 'nice guys finish last' exists, it's because they do. Constantly. All throughout history. And only being 'nice' is so one-dimentional and self-defeating I am constantly surprised when people are genuinely shocked when they find themselves knee deep in the friend zone.

So, how to turn this around? It's one thing to call people out for this sh*t, but it's another to help quash it.

JAY WILL HELP

What you need to do is rewind. Back in school when you were choosing your social paths. You notice how some people were being dicks and you chose to be nice? That wasn't a conscious choice, it was dictated by confidence levels. And I have a secret for you, they're not set in stone or finite.

You need to do a few things to build confidence, and it starts from the ground up, as confidence in one area leads to others.

• Fix your f*cking posture. Roll your shoulders back, chin up. Make an effort to maintain it. Get a gym ball, do lower and upper back exercises, stop slouching. It's been mentioned in this thread about how loads of chicks go for attractive dudes, well it's not all facial genetics and muscles, it's how you hold yourself, and it is - for lack of a better word - to do with swagger.

• Drink more water. f*ck, do I need to rationalise this? Cut out soft drink while you're at it.

• Give off the impression that you actually give a sh*t about what you look like. This involves proper diet, exercise and stuff like grooming. Give this a look. Give girls a reason to give you a chance to talk to them without resorting to being nice. Do something with your f*cking hair. This is 2012, you're most probably going after Gen Y girls. f*ck.

Now I'm not going to bleat about pick up artistry or anything. There's a middle ground. Girls like cheeky assholes. Not assholes. Cheeky assholes. There's a difference. If you don't have a sense of humour already just watch The Simpsons a lot.

Find points if interest, passions, that are outside the social stigmas. And yeah, that means sh*t like sportz, outdoorsy activities and quintessentially manly sh*t that girls may or may not be into, but definitely do not actively prejudice against. If you're being friendzoned you probably don't have the character to pull off ironic idolisation unless you find a chick that also appreciates it. So keep it to yourself until she knows you better.

Acknowledge your limits when it comes to drugs and alcohol and do not exceed them. Take the edge off, lose those inhibitions if you have to. Don't dance unless you are somewhat confident while sober. Just because you're drunk doesn't rationalise schlepping about on a d-floor chasing poo-nanny.

Actively debate topics but don't boil over about it. Do the opposite of what an autistic would. In fact, that is sage advice for most situations. Also don't self diagnose aspergers. That is a crutch and an enabling device for the aforementioned sh*t attitude that nice guys have. You're already doing a nice job fitting into the nicely carved box of self pity and excuses, no need to close the lid.

Now, summarise.

- cut the cancer
- don't think any and all friendships with women are bad
- your attitudes are born from way back, to flip them you need to unlearn a lot
- 'nice guys' are f*ckwits, and not an excuse
- outside of the internet, you will get absolutely zero sympathy
- chicks dig confidence. get confident f*cker
- women aren't magic sex devices, and those that wont f*ck you aren't defective
- help yourself
- posture
- water
- grooming
- exercise/diet/etc (not really essential, especially if you're actually interesting)
- be cheeky, actually smile a bit but don't fake it. All other times be serious
- don't abuse substances to talk to women
- don't be aspie
- don't take this post seriously. You'll just be reaffirming everything I said. Ha.

[EscoLehGo]

That's a lot of work just for some pussy, I think you need to take it off that pedestal unless that post was aimed at a bitter basement dwelling virgin man-child with absolutely no personality or sense of self.

[Jay]

QUOTE (EscoLehGo @ Friday, May 18 2012, 03:04)

I think you need to take it off that pedestal

Woah, did you actually read the post? I explicitly said that it is not something that comes from actively seeking it out single mindedly. All my solutions were centred around self improvement and actually becoming a better person, the pussy comes naturally after that. It's a fundamental problem that nice guys and friendzoners and whathaveyou have. There's nothing, if little, stopping them from changing that.

Also stop wearing fedoras. f*ck sake.

[Robinski]

Sorting yourself out does a lot more for you than "getting pussy". Most of that stuff is something anybody can benefit from. And to add on to what I see as Jay's points about general self improvement, buy some clothes that f*cking fit right. Does my nut in seeing people who can't dress themselves.

PS I was waiting for the words "nice guy" to pop up in here before I posted, glad they came in that form.

E:

QUOTE

Also stop wearing fedoras. f*ck sake.

Holy f*cking sh*t. THIS.

[EscoLehGo]

QUOTE (Jay @ Thursday, May 17 2012, 17:37)

QUOTE (EscoLehGo @ Friday, May 18 2012, 03:04) I think you need to take it off that pedestal Woah, did you actually read the post? I explicitly said that it is not something that comes from actively seeking it out single mindedly. All my solutions were centred around self improvement and actually becoming a better person, the pussy comes naturally after that. It's a fundamental problem that nice guys and friendzoners and whathaveyou have. There's nothing, if little, stopping them from changing that. Also stop wearing fedoras. f*ck sake.

I don't know man, just seems like a lot of stuff going on. I've never had a problem talking to girls though, I have a very simple formula.

1. Don't be creepy
2. Ask them questions about themselves and fake interest (Young women love talking about themselves, they all think they should have reality tv shows centered around their VERY, VERY interesting and unique lives)
3. At least listen to 50% of what they say and regurgitate it with counter questions so they know you're "listening".
4. Don't come off as too thirsty
5. Use some wit, make a few comedic observations during the conversation.
6. Give the impression that at the end of the day the outcome of this interaction doesn't matter because you have a roster.
7. Don't be creepy.

That's pretty much it, but I have the feeling that post was aimed at someone with very poor social skills.

[Jay]

QUOTE (EscoLehGo @ Friday, May 18 2012, 03:15)

That's pretty much it, but I have the feeling that post was aimed at someone with very poor social skills.

Yeah it was.

You're looking at it too microscopically, though. It's one thing to give a dude some pointers on how to talk to chicks and sending him on his way. It's another to strip it back and change the way he feels about himself so the change comes naturally. I wouldn't spruik it if I didn't believe in it. I've seen it happen.

The posture thing, really. It's a start and it's all a domino effect from there.

[EscoLehGo]

Yea I think you're talking about a guy who's a real mess though, you don't have to be a complete weirdo to get put in the friend zone. These guys just often lack confidence and charisma. I think you're thinking of the friend zone guys as being these mouth breathing neck bearded creeps who follow these chicks around border line stalking them. That's often not the case as the authorities would become involved with a situation like that. You don't have to remodel your entire life to get girls, just get some confidence and swagger about yourself, don't take it so seriously and realize that rejection happens form time to time.