[Driftking120]

3. The titty ninjas begin to attack everyone in the bar.
*Everyone starts to panic because the ninjas are attacking them*
*Suddenly a ninja aproachs roman*
*The titty ninja then kicks roman in the nuts*
"OW!! that was my nuts you phycopath" Yells roman
*The titty ninja then pulls out a glock and shoots roman in the nuts*
"You like that baby?" says the titty ninja
what happens next?
1. Romans nuts begin to bleed like a fire hydrant, getting everyone in the bar drenched
2. the titty ninja kicks niko in the nuts then she proceeds to shooting niko in the nuts
3. Yusuf says "Yo dat was some serious gangsta sheet!!"
4. the titty ninjas all start doing a pole dance

[The_Anti-tragedy]

I got beat to the post... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (Driftking120 @ Sunday, Mar 25 2012, 18:25)

1. Romans nuts begin to bleed like a fire hydrant, getting everyone in the bar drenched

Everyone: EWWW!!!
Guy: I'M COVERED IN CROTCH BLOOD!!!!
The place gets tinted red and black with "Red Blood-From-the-Crotch Redemption" appears.
Niko: WTF?
Niko plugs Roman's crotch with a grenade. Luis trips accidentally turning it into a live grenade. Niko tries to throw it but can't get it out of Roman's wound. The grenade blows up and Roman's testicles splat on Niko's face. His genitals splat into Luis' mouth.
Drunk guy: wOw TaLk AboUt FElLaTio!!!!!
Luis spits out Roman's dick and kills Roman making sure he's dead. Roman is now dead and no more blood is spraying everywhere. Dora and Boots come out of nowhere.
Dora & Boots: WE DID IT! WE DID IT!
Niko blows both of their heads off with an AA12. A titty ninja falls on top of Niko and tries choking him. Niko breaks free and notices, there's a TITTY NINJA ATTACK!!!!!!!!!
Niko: TITTY NINJA ATTACK! AHH!
Everyone runs everywhere inside the bar running away from the countless number of titty ninjas spawning everywhere.
Luis: Huh, Roman would love this.
1. Brian and Peter Griffin appear and shoot all the ninjas saving everyone.
2. SpongeBob catches all of the titty ninjas by catching them with his jellyfish net.
3. The ninjas all catch on fire somehow and die. Everyone turns the other direction and sees [insert character here].
4. Mallorie comes to see if Roman is cheating on him and gets upset so she beats up all of the titty ninjas as She-Hulk.

[The_Anti-tragedy]

bump

[AlexGTAGamer]

QUOTE (The_Anti-tragedy @ Monday, Mar 26 2012, 02:00)

3. The ninjas all catch on fire somehow and die. Everyone turns the other direction and sees [insert character here].

Horatio Caine: "You're all..."
Niko: "Oh I know what's coming next."
Horatio: *Puts on sunglasses* "Fired."
Everyone in the bar: "YYYYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!!!" A montage of action scenes and CSI related things then happens whilst "Won't Get Fooled Again" plays in the background. When that is finished we head back to the bar.
Niko: "That was really cool."
Horatio: "I've got to head to Bohan now to investigate a double homicide."
Niko: "Will we see you again?"
Horatio: "Quite possibly." Horatio then leaves the bar, hops into his silver CSI Hummer and drives away.
Niko: "What should I do now?"

1. Rob the bar.
2. Shoot everyone in the bar.
3. Steal a vehicle.
4. Go to one of his apartments.
5. Something extreme.

This post has been edited by AlexGTAGamer on Monday, Mar 26 2012, 22:57

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (AlexGTAGamer @ Monday, Mar 26 2012, 22:50)

3. Steal a vehicle.

Niko steals a bus across the street and drives into the bus killing some people.
Niko: Hey everybody. Want to get in?
Everyone: Hell YEAH!!
Niko picks everyone up. He drives them to the construction site in Broker and tries having an obstacle course with them there.
Niko: WELCOME TO THE ANNUAL CONSTRUCTION SITE OBSTACLE COURSE! Contestants are, Roman Bellic, Jacob Hughes, Brucie Kibbutz! Dwayne Forge! Packie McReary! Gerry McReary! Derrick McReary! Francis McReary! Real Badman! Bernie Crane! Phil Bell! And Ray Boccino!
Gerry and Derrick are too drunk to go up a ladder, they're disqualifed. Roman goes up to the crane but hits his crotch on the edge of a building and falls making him disqualifed. Brucie and Jacob are able to get to the first building. Dwayne goes to the second building succesfully. Badman jumps to the second building, but forgets to jump due to smoking too much making him disqualifed. Dwayne tries to show off by jumping to the last building without the stairs. He falls and dies making him disqualifed. Ray thought he saw diamonds at the end of the crane so he missed the building and died being disqualified. Brucie, Jacob, Packie, Francis, Bernie, and Phil are left in the competition.
1. Brucie has too much steroids and gets distracted in his tiny genitalia making him disqualifed while Bernie pushes Phil off the building.
2. Phil pushes Bernie off the building and falls onto Gerry and Derrick.
3. Packie pushes Francis off the building but Brucie punches him off the building.
4. Packie and Jacob are tired so they smoke and drink so they are both high and wasted so they push everyone off the building.
5. Jacob thought there was more to the obstacle course and falls off the ends.

[Driftking120]

4. Packie and Jacob are tired so they smoke and drink so they are both high and wasted so they push everyone off the building.
"Opps, sorry about that!" yells packie
"Yeah! What he said!" yells Little Jacob
Packie and Jacob while still drunk thought that they saw a talking cement mixer, so they accidently jump off of the building and die.
who do we follow?
1. Ned Luke
2. Mike Whitley
3. Lazlow
4. LCPD officer
5. Burger Shot worker

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (Driftking120 @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 00:50)

5. Burger Shot worker

At the Burger Shot, a worker is giving lots of burgers to the customers. One steals money from the cash register.
Worker: Hey, get back here with that money!
Perp: Hehehehehehehehheh!!!
Worker: WTF is wrong with his laugh?
Niko pushes the worker aside and shoots the perp multiple times until he gives the money back. Niko gives the worker the money.
Worker: Wait a minute... this money is counterfeit!
Niko blows up the perp with an RPG killing him.
Niko: Here's the real money, sir.
Worker: Hey thanks.
The worker runs off back to the Burger Shot and continues his job. Niko runs off and dumps the perp's body into the river. He gets in a Dukes parked on the street and goes to...
1. Roman's cab business wherever it is for the rest of the story.
2. Brucie to learn how to get "juiced to the max" like him.
3. Funland but gets stopped by Dmitri who needs help with something.
4. The LCPD station to investigate the body he found in the trunk of the car.
5. Maisonette 09 and partys with his friends.

[AlexGTAGamer]

QUOTE (The_Anti-tragedy @ Wednesday, Mar 28 2012, 16:10)

3. Funland but gets stopped by Dmitri who needs help with something.

Dimitri: "Niko I need your help with something."
Niko: "No way Dimitri, you spineless snake." Niko takes out a shotgun and blasts Dimitri in the face. "Yuck, what a mess." At this point Luis pops up in the passenger seat next to Niko.
Luis: "That's what she said."
Niko: "I don't get it."
Luis: "Never mind then." Luis then jumps out the the car and gets hit by an ice-cream truck.
Niko: "That's what she said. What does that mean?" *Ponders* "Oh now I know. Ha ha, that was pretty funny."
Horatio then turns up in his Hummer with some forensics officers and LCPD officers who investigate Luis getting hit by an ice-cream truck.
Horatio: "Looks like he wasn't screaming just for ice-cream."
Niko: "I better get out of here before I get stuck in a montage-" Too late.
YYYYYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!

*A few minutes later*

Niko: "Why did I come here again?"
Ned Luke then runs down the road, stops by the car, looks at Niko and says:
Ned: "For the weather."
Niko: "Bugger of Luke." He then runs away. "Oh now I know what I was going to do, I was going to go to Funland."

Niko arrives at Funland and sees that the place is closed whilst the Screamer rollercoaster is being repaired.
Niko: "Now what should I do?"

1. Go to Burger Shot.
2. Go and see Roman.
3. Go to one of his safehouses.
4. Go to Maisonette 9.
5. [Insert activity here].

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (AlexGTAGamer @ Sunday, Apr 1 2012, 01:38)

2. Go and see Roman.

Niko calls Roman for an activity.
Niko: Hey cousin, want to go to the strip club?
Roman: Sorry Niko. Mallorie's negotiating with me right now, so no.
Niko: Okay. Maybe another time. *Hangs up* You know, I really should not say "Another time" because that never happens. Who else is my friend. I wish Bernie was here, then I can make offensive homosexual jokes about him... I'll call him.
Niko calls Bernie to see how he's doing. Bernie refuses to tell him for reasons unknown. After the phone call, Niko gets in a SuperGT and drives to Bernie's place in a short amount of time. When he gets in his apartment, he finds Bernie almost going to hang himself.
Niko: Bernie!! *Niko grabs a knife and cuts the rope saving Bernie* Bernie, what the f*ck are you doing?
Bernie: Trying to kill myself! Bryce doesn't love me anymore!
Niko: Sometimes I wonder if he ever did... Anyways, you have to get over him. Maybe you should use that dating site Roman told me about.
Bernie: You mean Lovemeet? That site where you think you're going out with the man of your dreams then you find out they have huge meetings and don't have time for you?
Niko: All right, screw this.
Niko leaves. As soon as Niko closes the door, Bernie opens up his laptop and goes to Lovemeet.net. He goes to the Male category and arranges a date with Tom Rivas.
1. Brucie calls Niko to tell him that his mechanic is quitting unless he has $100,000.
2. Niko is surprised to find a dead Bernie fall out the window.
3. Roman calls Niko to give him money for no reason.
4. Little Jacob calls to ask him to go bowling.
5. Badman calls Niko for no reason.

[AlexGTAGamer]

QUOTE (The_Anti-tragedy @ Sunday, Apr 1 2012, 03:42)

2. Niko is surprised to find a dead Bernie fall out the window.

Niko: "Looks like Bernie fell head over heels, out of the window, in love." Niko waits for a loud "YEAH!" scream and a montage, but nothing happens. "The CSI team must be out of town."
Niko gets back into his car and drives down the street when suddenly a news alert comes onto the radio.
News Alert: "There is a hostage situation going on at a cab depot in Hove Beach. It is thought that one Roman Bellic is being held hostage by his lover Mallorie Bardas who is threatening to shoot anyone who comes near to the building. It is unknown what has sparked this situation but friends of Mr. Bellic say it is due to his very active sex life. More on this story as it develops."
Niko: "Damn. I knew this was going to happen sooner or later. I better get over there and stop this."

*One frantic drive later*

Niko stops his car and runs over to a LCPD officer with a megaphone who is pleading with Mallorie to release Roman.
Niko: "I'm Roman's cousin, let me speak to him and Mallorie."
LCPD officer: "Good luck."
Niko: "Roman it's your cousin."
Roman: "Help me Niko, Mallorie has gone insane!"
Mallorie: "Shut up you backstabber!"
Niko: "Mallorie just let Roman go. There are NOOSE snipers on the roofs of the surrounding buildings who wil shoot and kill you unless you release him."
Mallorie: "Then let them shoot me then, I'll just bring Roman down with me!"
Roman: "HEEELLLLLPPPPP!!!"
Niko: "Screw this I'm going in."
LCPD officer: "Sir I advise that you don't-"
Niko: "I know what I'm doing." Niko passes through the police line and walks towards the depot.
Mallorie: "Niko stay back, I will shoot you! I'm warning you!"
Niko walks inside of the building. Silence. The LCPD and NOOSE officers along with news reporters and bystanders all become worried.
LCPD officer: "He's been in there long enough, move in, move in!" Officers rush towards the building but then Niko walks out with Roman and Mallorie who has her hands tied with a cable.
Bystander: "He did it!" Everyone begins to cheer when...

1. A meteor smashes into Hove Beach killing everyone.
2. A secret bomb planted inside the depot by Mallorie explodes.
3. A NOOSE sniper shoots Mallorie.
4. A bus being driven by a very drunk Luis smashes through the police line sending everyone into a mass panic.
5. Something very random happens.

This post has been edited by AlexGTAGamer on Sunday, Apr 1 2012, 16:20

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (AlexGTAGamer @ Sunday, Apr 1 2012, 16:18)

4. A bus being driven by a very drunk Luis smashes through the police line sending everyone into a mass panic.

Luis in his bus crashes the cab depot crushing Mallorie and Roman along with several LCPD officers. Luis gets knocked out due to the huge impact. The airbag goes off filling up the bus. Brucie calls Niko.
Brucie: Hey Niko, there's this guy, one of the racers. He wants money because you kept winning against him.
Niko: All right.
Brucie: All right, I'll meet you at the 69th St. Diner and you better have $100,000.
Niko: Okay, I'll be there.
Niko goes to an ATM machine in Schottler and gets $100,000 from his bank account. He drives to the 69th Street Diner in Hove Beach. On the way, he sees a fire truck approaching from BOABO. He spots the bus on fire with a dead Mallorie and Roman. He drives to the Diner in Hove Beach and pulls over. He enters the place and takes a seat.
Niko: Where is that steroid junkie??
Brucie comes in and sees Niko... and also sees Bernie and Tom Rivas on a date.
Brucie: Hey it's that gay guy! He owes me money!
Bernie: Oh yeah, I like that Prince guy too... *Brucie aims a gun at both of them* Oh sh*t! What are you doing?!
Brucie: I'm gonna kill this guy!
Brucie shoots Tom and Bernie runs away. While still running, he gets crushed by a bus backing up. Niko shoots Brucie in the stomach and gives him the money when he has his attention. Niko goes and gets in his car. He goes to the cab depot and still sees LCPD officers on the floor, the other LCPD officers that survived have their heads turned the opposite way. An anonymous figure pulls the bodies away.
Niko: What the f*ck? Who is that!
Niko chases the shadow, they jump on a beam off the hill and off of the crates with Niko still chasing the person. Niko grabs the person by the hair and turn their face around, it's...
1. Eddie Low
2. Mallorie who turned out to survive
3. Bernie
4. An LCPD officer
5. Dwayne

[Driftking120]

1. Eddie Low
"Who are you?" Says Niko
"I'm no one, trust me, you don't want to know" Says Eddie
"Alright boys, drop it!" Yells eddie at a passing helicopter
*Eddie then grabs onto a ladder the helicopter had dropped for him, and while using his free hand, pulls out a m16 while the helicopter is taking off, and then begins to fire it at niko*
*One of the stray bullets from the m16 hits the gas tank of a nearby train, causing it to explode, this causes the tracks underneath it to collapse*
"Oh Sh*t, Get us the heck out of here!!" Yells eddie to the helicopter pilot
what happens next??
1. Niko has one rocket left and aims at Eddie Low's copter with it
2. Niko pursues the helicopter on foot firing a minigun at it
3. Niko Steals a banshee and pursues eddie's helicopter

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (Driftking120 @ Sunday, Apr 1 2012, 23:55)

1. Eddie Low 1. Niko has one rocket left and aims at Eddie Low's copter with it

Niko blows up Eddie's chopper. Eddie parachutes from the choppr and lands.
Niko: Why do you want those bodies?
Eddie tells an emotionally scarring flashback about Roman stealing Mallorie from him. Niko kills him anyway and runs to the chopper. He finds Mallorie and Roman's bodies and wonders why they haven't respawned.
Roman: HEY COUSIN!
Niko: AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH#$!@!!@!##!@E2E1U1E24123!#@$
Roman laughs until he has irregular pulse.
Roman & Mallorie: APRIL FOOLS!!!
Niko: What the f*ck?
Mallorie: Those were decoys. I used a magic trick I learned from school to make Roman and I teleport to somewhere before we got "crushed" by the bus. Then we had a wonderful afternoon. That was just a prank!
Niko: You sick bitches!! But then what about the time where everyone was at the depot??
Mallorie: Everyone was in on the prank.
Niko grabs an M4 and blows the sh*t out of Roman and Mallorie. Eddie turns around behind him and tells him that his body was a robot.
Now what does Niko do?
1. Kills Eddie too.
2. Set up the ultimate April Fools prank.
3. Go to Brucie to ask if he was in on the prank too.
4. Kill everyone in LC who was in on the prank.

This post has been edited by The_Anti-tragedy on Monday, Apr 2 2012, 00:27

[AlexGTAGamer]

QUOTE (The_Anti-tragedy @ Monday, Apr 2 2012, 01:24)

2. Set up the ultimate April Fools prank.

Niko steals a passing car and drives over to the Weazel News building (where ever that is). He climbs to the roof of the building and goes to the satellite dishes where he does some electrical stuff that allows the satellites to focus on his South Bohan apartment. He quickly rushes to that location, throws on a suit, sets up a camera and reports a fake breaking news bulletin.
Niko: "This just in! NASA have confirmed that an asteroid the size of Texas is heading towards Liberty City. Authorities are urging all L.C residents to evacuate immediately before tomorrow night when it is expected to hit."
Suddenly a hell of a lot of screaming is heard outside. Niko peers out of the window and sees people running around panicking robbing homes and stores, stealing vehicles, praying, and destroying things. Niko then goes onto his laptop to search some various websites which are uploading other news reports and videos of people going crazy all over Liberty City. F.I.A is filled with people, the bridges, highways and the Booth Tunnel are all filled with vehicles of people trying to flee, LCPD officers and emergency crews are struggling to bring control back and figures in City Hall are being evacuated to helicopters and convoys.
Niko: "Hahahahaha!" Niko records another message. "April Fools! There is no asteroid, it was all a joke and you fell for it!" The screams fall silent and a large rumble can be heard by Niko. "Is that an earthquake?" Again Niko looks out of his window and sees a massive angry mob of L.C residents, emergency crews, city officials and even some of his friends marching towards his safe house.
Niko: "Oh crap!"

1. Niko runs to the roof of the building and jumps from roof to roof to escape from the mob.
2. An actual asteroid smashes into South Bohan wiping the place off of the L.C map.
3. A squadron of Buzzards, Annihilators, heavily armed LCPD, FIB and NOOSE officers, and even some APCs all begin to fire on the building.
4. Niko runs into the back alley and steals a Faggio back there and tries to outrun the angry mob.
5. Something very incredible happens.

This post has been edited by AlexGTAGamer on Monday, Apr 2 2012, 03:31

[billy james]

3. A squadron of Buzzards, Annihilators, heavily armed LCPD, FIB and NOOSE officers, and even some APCs all begin to fire on the building.

(Niko) I am so screwed

Niko then sees some writing saying "Niko Last Stand" popping up

(Niko) Hey a conveniently placed RPG that has 1 rocket in it.
He shoots the rocket at a helicopter that causes a chain reaction

What happens next
1) Yusef shows up
2) A biulding blow up
3) A Tsunami happens
4) Another wave of Buzzards, Annihilators, heavily armed LCPD, FIB and NOOSE officers show up

[AlexGTAGamer]

QUOTE (billy james @ Monday, Apr 2 2012, 09:36)

1) Yusef shows up

Yusuf in his Gold Buzzard shows up and begins to fire at LCPD, FIB and NOOSE vehicles which are scattered around on the street.
Yusuf: "Boooooom! Bye bye bitches!"
The angry mob starts to panic and people start to flee in varying directions. Some officers try to fire at the Buzzard but they are blown sky high by rockets.
Niko: "What the heck is Yusuf doing here?"
Yusuf: "Watch out Niko!" Yusuf fires a rocket at the front of the building causing it to collapse. Yusuf brings the helicopter down near to where the front of the building used to be. "Jump on!"
Niko: "Oh shiiii-" Niko jumps out of his apartment and grabs onto the landing skid. He turns around only to see the entire building now collapse behind him. "Oh man, that was close!" Niko manages to climb into the back of the Buzzard.
Yusuf: "You okay N man?"
Niko: "Yeah I'm good. Why did you come and help me Yusuf?"
Yusuf: "Because that was the funniest April Fools joke I have heard encountered! You sparked a city wide mass panic! That is some serious gangster s-"
Niko: "Okay, thanks Yusuf."
Niko is dropped off at the Helitours site and Yusuf flies away.

What happens next?
1. Luis shows up in another Buzzard and tries to blow Yusuf out of the sky.
2. Niko steals a Helitours helicopter.
3. Niko goes on a Helitours ride.
4. Niko starts a fight with a random ped waiting in a line.
5. Niko goes to eat a hotdog.

[The_Anti-tragedy]

QUOTE (AlexGTAGamer @ Tuesday, Apr 3 2012, 11:30)

3. Niko goes on a Helitours ride.

Pilot: Hi, I'm Vicki.
Niko: Hey.
Niko spots the angry mob right there and they someho jump onto the chopper. The chopper can't withstand all the weight of the people.
Niko: WHOA WHOA WAIT EVERYONE! Roman, get off. *The helicopter is able to rise* Now get back on. *Roman gets on and the chopper goes down* Holy sh*t really? Okay, continue.
Mob: KILL HIM! KILL HIM! KILL HIM!
Niko take over as pilot and pushes Vicki out of the chopper into the mob where he is torn to pieces like how Yusuf banged his prostitutes to pieces. Niko flies the chopper towards the Statue of Happiness and sees the mob swim really fast onto the island the speed of the chopper and take down the statue in seconds.
Niko: You know, you guys can just climb the statue and jump on.
The mob pauses for a second then rebuilds the statue in ten seconds and starts climbing.
Niko: No way, Jose!
Niko flies away in the chopper.
1. The angry mob get in boats and one of them even in the yacht.
2. Niko leaves the chopper for a Buzzard and destroys the angry mob.
3. Roman jumps onto Niko's chopper, "Oh sh*t!"
4. Little Jacob gets so high on crack he literally goes up in the sky and messes up Niko's blades.
5. The angry mob get a huge meteor and throw it at Niko's chopper but hits Dukes instead.

[VoiceoftheVoiceless]

QUOTE (AlexGTAGamer @ Tuesday, Apr 3 2012, 06:30)

QUOTE (billy james @ Monday, Apr 2 2012, 09:36) 1) Yusef shows up Yusuf in his Gold Buzzard shows up and begins to fire at LCPD, FIB and NOOSE vehicles which are scattered around on the street. Yusuf: "Boooooom! Bye bye bitches!" The angry mob starts to panic and people start to flee in varying directions. Some officers try to fire at the Buzzard but they are blown sky high by rockets. Niko: "What the heck is Yusuf doing here?" Yusuf: "Watch out Niko!" Yusuf fires a rocket at the front of the building causing it to collapse. Yusuf brings the helicopter down near to where the front of the building used to be. "Jump on!" Niko: "Oh shiiii-" Niko jumps out of his apartment and grabs onto the landing skid. He turns around only to see the entire building now collapse behind him. "Oh man, that was close!" Niko manages to climb into the back of the Buzzard. Yusuf: "You okay N man?" Niko: "Yeah I'm good. Why did you come and help me Yusuf?" Yusuf: "Because that was the funniest April Fools joke I have heard encountered! You sparked a city wide mass panic! That is some serious gangster s-" Niko: "Okay, thanks Yusuf." Niko is dropped off at the Helitours site and Yusuf flies away. What happens next? 1. Luis shows up in another Buzzard and tries to blow Yusuf out of the sky. 2. Niko steals a Helitours helicopter. 3. Niko goes on a Helitours ride. 4. Niko starts a fight with a random ped waiting in a line. 5. Niko goes to eat a hotdog.

ignore this post

This post has been edited by VoiceoftheVoiceless on Tuesday, Apr 3 2012, 22:44

[AlexGTAGamer]

We'll carry on from The_Anti-tragedy's post since he got it first.

This post has been edited by AlexGTAGamer on Tuesday, Apr 3 2012, 22:41