[Money Over Bullshit]

QUOTE (akavari112 @ Monday, Feb 20 2012, 17:07)

I think you should continue the topic. You shouldn't write for the sake of receiving our crummy comments, do it out of interest for your own story. I think what you've got going here is great, and it'd be a shame to see it fall short of its potential. If it makes you feel any better I'll do my best to give feedback on each chapter from here on out. It's tough times for concepts right now in this forum, but don't let it get to you. If I were smart I would have moved on with my life from writing concepts but it's just so f*cking satisfying for some reason

The lack of feedback didn't bother me too much at the start but at this stage it just makes it seem like a waste of time. I have a desire to continue and complete the story but I don't want it to feel like I'm the only one that's interested in it. Any advice you can give me in order to improve the topic in the future??

This post has been edited by Money Over Bullshit on Tuesday, Feb 21 2012, 01:27

[Claude4Catalina]

one thing I'd like to see is the re-intergration of missions to introduce certain weapons...like how San Andreas used a mission to introduce the Silenced 9mm, obviously have reasons for the mission as well but it'd a good chance to do something that I dont really feel was done in othet DLCs, only really explosive weapons were introduced in some missions. excuse me if I'm being ignorant about it, I'm doing this of the top of my head as I havent read this topic in a while, really need to set myself an hour or so aside so I can get it read.

it is disheartening when you dont get feedback, I should know cause of how unnoticed D&S went and frankly some of it was dogsh*t, but if you can keep the few like-minded members, such as me, akavari, Pedochu and yourself just for starters, engaged and interested, it becomes worth it. one thing that I learnt from reading up about The Wire (I know I go on about it like it's something God himself gave us) is that you shouldnt have to adjust your writing just because people arent up for reading long paragraphs. so what? f*ck 'em! if people want a brief paragraph describing a mission, they can go find a topic by one of the IV fanboys that joined up to wank over V's trailer and thought they could do what we do. if people want a decent read that could be compared to a short story, then they'll come to topics like this. thats the make or break factor, yeah I dont really post much apart from to blow my own horn, but you'll always have me lurking and reading most concepts, and honest to God this stands out as something that breaks the mould.

[Tyla]

What you’ve got here MOB is a masterpiece. You’ve got combining the elements of pop culture Mafia we know and love down to a fine art. The mobbed up reader salivates with each fresh passing chapter while to the general viewer, this epic is so lengthy and engrossing it can turn into a real strain on the eyes and timepiece. With all you’ve dedicated to this, absolutely do not pack it in. See Family Ties out to the end. There are areas you could condense down to make more brief to the general viewer but definitely do not detract from the atmosphere of this piece for sake of attaining interest. That’d be a real disservice to the concept and the characters you’ve tirelessly fleshed out.

Your previous chapter was excellent. The real benefit of your effort in detailing shines through here with how you've built up the new and brief faces to interact alongside the characters we're more accustomed to. There was just enough on Frank Garone to justify the course of action he took and where the story will now likely head. Not an overload of him. A solid build up and twist unexpected. I can't help but feel your story can only go from strength to strength in this respect as now you've several characters lurking in the background with various motives. Some favourable, some threatening. Does a great job of putting you in the shoes of a conflicted Mafia associate. A guy at risk of being clipped out at any point without retribution.

Rudy - Is this Rudy D'Avanzo?

[SWOT]

Yes this is a masterpiece, don't get me wrong but my problem is that this concept is too long winded. How is Carlo supposed to go through every Commission family in one DLC?

[Money Over Bullshit]

QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Tuesday, Feb 21 2012, 19:42)

one thing I'd like to see is the re-intergration of missions to introduce certain weapons...like how San Andreas used a mission to introduce the Silenced 9mm, obviously have reasons for the mission as well but it'd a good chance to do something that I dont really feel was done in othet DLCs, only really explosive weapons were introduced in some missions.  excuse me if I'm being ignorant about it, I'm doing this of the top of my head as I havent read this topic in a while, really need to set myself an hour or so aside so I can get it read. it is disheartening when you dont get feedback, I should know cause of how unnoticed D&S went and frankly some of it was dogsh*t, but if you can keep the few like-minded members, such as me, akavari, Pedochu and yourself just for starters, engaged and interested, it becomes worth it.  one thing that I learnt from reading up about The Wire (I know I go on about it like it's something God himself gave us) is that you shouldnt have to adjust your writing just because people arent up for reading long paragraphs.  so what? f*ck 'em!  if people want a brief paragraph describing a mission, they can go find a topic by one of the IV fanboys that joined up to wank over V's trailer and thought they could do what we do.  if people want a decent read that could be compared to a short story, then they'll come to topics like this.  thats the make or break factor, yeah I dont really post much apart from to blow my own horn, but you'll always have me lurking and reading most concepts, and honest to God this stands out as something that breaks the mould.

Well said C4C

I had got some missions which introduced certain weapons in my last topic, although I do plan on doing it to some extent with this topic too.

QUOTE (Tyla @ Friday, Feb 24 2012, 14:09)

What you’ve got here MOB is a masterpiece. You’ve got combining the elements of pop culture Mafia we know and love down to a fine art. The mobbed up reader salivates with each fresh passing chapter while to the general viewer, this epic is so lengthy and engrossing it can turn into a real strain on the eyes and timepiece. With all you’ve dedicated to this, absolutely do not pack it in. See Family Ties out to the end. There are areas you could condense down to make more brief to the general viewer but definitely do not detract from the atmosphere of this piece for sake of attaining interest. That’d be a real disservice to the concept and the characters you’ve tirelessly fleshed out. Your previous chapter was excellent. The real benefit of your effort in detailing shines through here with how you've built up the new and brief faces to interact alongside the characters we're more accustomed to. There was just enough on Frank Garone to justify the course of action he took and where the story will now likely head. Not an overload of him. A solid build up and twist unexpected. I can't help but feel your story can only go from strength to strength in this respect as now you've several characters lurking in the background with various motives. Some favourable, some threatening. Does a great job of putting you in the shoes of a conflicted Mafia associate. A guy at risk of being clipped out at any point without retribution.

That's quite the review Tyla, thanks for taking the time to write it and yes it is Rudy D'Avanzo

The main qualm people seem to have with the story is that the chapters are too long although they do seem to find the story interesting which is good. So far the story is almost as long as The Great Gatsby which is a point of personal pride on one hand and overindulgence on the other. I've started writing the next chapter which is looking to be a lot briefer than the last few in terms of writing so reading the story from here on out should be a lot less painful.

@SWOT: Thanks for the feedback. To answer your question, realistically he couldn't but GTA is not a totally realistic universe so anything is possible. I had first battled with the possibilities of him being able to work for all sides involved (especially in such a short time) but then I read of a similar situation where a wiseguy did just that in a few short years so therefore it's not preposterous that Carlo could do the same, albeit in a few short months.

Do you guys think it would be better (if possible) if I were to split each part of the posted chapters into a seperate post in order to make it less arduous for people to read??

This post has been edited by Money Over Bullshit on Monday, May 14 2012, 00:03

[Claude4Catalina]

to take a stand back and be a bit introspective about it; yeah it may be an idea to break it down some there's more of a break between missions to keep up interest from the casual reader, yeah that may help.

[Money Over Bullshit]

Ok, I've split up the chapters and I've also added titles for each chapter. Hopefully that makes it easier for the reader

[Money Over Bullshit]

New addition coming soon!! Just gotta iron out a few creases.

EDIT: Part one of the new chapter below, give feedback

This post has been edited by Money Over Bullshit on Wednesday, Mar 21 2012, 17:39

[Money Over Bullshit]

Chapter 9 – Paying The Piper

Part 1

Carlo receives a call from his mother

Carlo: "Hello"

Mrs. Devino: "Carlo? Is that you?"

Carlo: "Yeah ma, it's me.. is everything ok?"

Mrs. Devino: "There's some men here to see you.. men in suits"

Carlo: "At your place? I'll be right over"

A marker will be set for Carlo's old apartment in Bohan. When you get there a cutscene will ensue.

Carlo will ring doorbell and it will shortly be answered by his mother who will greet him with a "hey sweetie" and give him a hug. Carlo will return the hug and give her a kiss on the cheek

Carlo: "Hey Ma"

Carlo will then walk into the living room area to find two men he does not recognise sitting on the couch drinking coffee, A short man with coiffed hair dressed in a grey sports coat and pants and a fat bald man who appears to be his bodyguard.

Short Man: "I think you better take a seat"

Carlo will comply taking a seat opposite the two men

At this point Carlo's mom will come over to check out what's going on

Mrs. Devino: "How's the coffee?"

Man: "Beautiful"

Mrs. Devino: "Can I fix you boys something to eat?"

Man: "No thank you Ma'am"

Carlo: "We're fine Ma.. go wait in the kitchen"

Mrs. Devino: "Oh.. ok"

Man: "What a nice lady" (putting his cup down on the coffee table) "It's Carlo right?"

Carlo: "Yeah.. and you are?"

Jimmy: "The name's Jimmy Capra"

Goon: "..Your worst f*ckin nightmare" (chuckles)

Carlo: "And him?"

Jimmy: "His name's.. not important"

Carlo: "So to what do I owe this pleasure?"

Jimmy: "We have some business to discuss"

Carlo: "We do?"

Jimmy: "Yeah. We do"

Carlo: "Ok then.. start talkin"

Jimmy: "Maybe we can go someplace else.. maybe discuss it over a plate of spaghetti.. the things we need to discuss might be a little.. rich for the old lady's ears, capiche"

Carlo: "She's lived in Bohan for the past thirty five years, I'm sure she's heard her share of rich language"

Jimmy: "Forgive me, I'm trying to be cordial out of respect for your mother and perhaps I gave you the wrong impression with my choice of tone. I wasn't askin you.. I was tellin you."
(Lifts one side of his jacket to reveal the butt of a .38 tucked in his pants)
"You're comin with us kid"

Carlo: "Oh yeah? And what if I don't want to?"

Jimmy: "Then I'll f*cking execute you right here and now"

Carlo: "Is that so?"

Jimmy: "Yeah. And you know why? Cause I don't very much give a f*ck"

Goon: "He don't"

Carlo will look across the apartment at his mother who is peacefully washing some dishes. Not wanting to bring any unnecessary drama to her home he will digress

Carlo: "I uh.. gotta go Ma"

Mrs. Devino: "You're leaving already? But you just got here"

Carlo: "Yeah, me and these gents gotta go to a meeting in the city"

Mrs. Devino: "Ok honey, come by again soon"

Carlo: "I will ma" (turning towards the two men) "Let's go"

The three men will exit the apartment

Carlo: "So what now? Are you gonna shoot me dead in the street"

Jimmy: "Don't be such a f*ckin drama queen. Just get in the car"

Carlo will be seated in the back seat beside Jimmy with his henchman at the wheel. The entire journey towards your destination will be automated and you can skip it if you wish.

If you let the driving sequence play out you will hear the following dialogue:

Carlo: "Don't I at least get to know where we're goin?"

Goon: "You'll see"

Jimmy: "Relax.. we just wanna talk"

Carlo: "You're not exactly putting me at ease here"

Jimmy: "Good. Cause I wasn't tryin to. Now shut the f*ck up.. the sound of your voice is irritating me"

Carlo (quietly): "Likewise"

After a few minutes the car will come to a stop outside an Italian eatery on Brown Place in Little Italy and Jimmy and Carlo will exit the car

Jimmy (to his henchman): "Go call our friend and tell him we're good"

Goon: "Sure thing Jimmy" he will then pull off

Jimmy and Carlo will enter the restaurant and be greeted at the door by another fat man with dark curly hair

Fat Man: "Ah Jimmy, I was beginning to think you wasn't comin back"

Jimmy: "Hey Bobby how ya doin"

Bobby: "Is this the guy?"

Jimmy: "Yeah this is him"

Bobby: "I'll be over to join you guys in a couple of minutes I just gotta go whip up a couple of orders. You want anything Jim?"

Jimmy: "I'll have some Cannelloni. You want a plate kid?"

Carlo: "No I'm good"

Bobby: "Ok I saved you guys a place over there, it's got candles and everything"

Jimmy (sarcastically): "Aw you shouldn't have"

Carlo and Jimmy will take a seat at the table

Carlo: "So what is this thing that we need to discuss?"

Jimmy: "I think you know"

Carlo (playing dumb): "Really, I have no idea"

Jimmy: "You do.. you just want to admit it"

Carlo: "No, I just haven't got a f*cking clue what your talking about"

Jimmy: "Save the amateur dramatics, your friend Rudy told us about the whole thing"

Carlo: "I don't know any Rudy"

Jimmy: "I suppose you don't know a Louie or a Frankie neither"

Carlo: "Never heard of 'em"

Jimmy: "That's funny, what's even funnier though you f*cking cock sucker is that you thought you were gonna get away with it. You played everything perfectly didn't ya, what you didn't bank on though was old Rudy singing like canary.. we didn't even have to put his wrinkled balls in a vice"

Carlo: "And you believe this Rudy person... like I said, I don't know the guy but he could be one big f*cking liar just tryna save his own ass"

Jimmy: "Rudy's a lot of things but he aint no liar, so when he tells me that some prick I never heard of helped two f*cking low life junkie f*cks dispose of one of my good friend's best girls like a f*cking dog in a baseball field on Charge Island I tend to believe the guy."

Carlo: "Oh Yeah.."

Jimmy: Don't even try and deny it.. your brow's as wet as a whore's c*nt. I'm like a wolf kid.. I can smell your fear"

Carlo (smiling antagonistically): "So what now"

Jimmy: "Usually I'd open your f*ckin head up like a tin of tomatas just for sitting there and lying to me but my bitch wife says I need to learn to control my anger. We both know what happened to your friend Louie and Frankie f*ck nuts got iced by the Albanians, Rudy gets a pass for ratting the rest a you guys out.. so that just leaves you kid"

Carlo: "Rudy gets a pass? I thought people in your line of work hated stoolies"

Jimmy: "We do but Rudy's got.. other uses. The crazy old f*ck is so desperate to get his button he'll do anything the families ask him to. (laughing hysterically) the prick is f*ckin oobatz.. I heard he blew up his own father in a fish factory cause he caught him wearing his mother's underwear.. and then he blamed it on the f*ckin chinks!! Sweet sick son of a bitch. Usually I don't approve of that faggy f*cking cross dressing sh*t but that's just f*ckin hilarious!"

Carlo: "I hear you have a bit of a reputation yourself"

Jimmy: "A lot of people speak about me like I'm a bad person.. it actually hurts my f*ckin' feelings to tell you the truth. I've got five kids and never laid a f*ckin finger on any one of em'.. that's what the belt is for" (laughs)

Carlo: "I wouldn't know"

Jimmy: "Give it time.. we're not so different you and me.. I actually had a a bit of a mishap with one of Harry's girls myself a few years back.."

Carlo: "Well actually, it wasn't me who.."

Jimmy will not pay attention to Carlo trying to correct him, he will just continue talking, in some twisted day dream.

"Yeah I really did a number on her.. caved her f*ckin face in.. actually kind of tragic when ya think about it... such a pretty girl she was..

Jimmy will trail off into a momentary trance as if to re-live the incident, smiling perversely

"With that said it wouldn't fair to punish you. That skifooze was worth a lot of money to me though.. I think you'll agree that I should be duly compensated"

Carlo: "I guess so.."

Jimmy: "And as much as I want to kill you.. and I really do, I realise that if I did I wouldn't see that debt repayed. So instead you're gonna work for me until such time as I see fit"

Carlo: "It doesn't sound like I have a choice"

Jimmy: "That's because you don't. I've got a little scheme going that the bosses don't know about and I need some guys outside the family to help me out with it"

Carlo: "I'm all ears"

Jimmy: "Ok well what I do is.."

Jimmy will be interrupted by an obnoxious middle class looking man in a sweater vest talking loudly a few meters from the table

Jimmy: "Hey you, yeah you in the f*ckin sweater vest.. could you keep it down over there, me and my friend here are trying to have a conversation"

Man: "My apologies sir.. I.. "

Jimmy: "Listen, just try to keep it down ok" (turns to Carlo) "So as I was sayin.."

Jimmy will again be interrupted by the man talking loudly

Jimmy (to Carlo): "Excuse me for a minute"

(walks over to the man's table)

"Didn't I tell you to shut the f*ck up!?"

Man: "What's your f*cking problem buddy? It's me and my wife's one year anniversary and we're just trying to have a good time"

Jimmy: "A good time? I can hardly hear myself think with you you loudmouth son of a bitch!"

Man: "Excuse me.."

Man's Wife (interjecting): "Just let it go Harold"

Man: "No f*ck that, It's a free country.. I can be as loud as I want. This guy needs to calm the f*ck down"

Jimmy: "Calm down huh?" (punches the guy square in the face knocking him to the floor)

"Don't you f*ckin' tell me to calm down!"

Jimmy will then stand over the customer and begin to pummel his face into the ground as the other customers scream in terror. At this point Bobby will run out from the back and pull Jimmy off of the customer who will at this point be lying unmoving on the floor in a bloody mess

Bobby: "Jesus christ Jimmy, what the hell are you doing!?"

Jimmy: "He's got some f*ckin nerve coming into my restaurant and talking to me like that"

He will then throw a few kicks into the grounded man's torso and shout "motherf*cker!" before again being pulled off by the hulking Bobby

Appearing to calm down a bit Jimmy will shamble over to a table in order to catch his breath before pulling out his .38 and threatening the horrified and screaming customers

Jimmy: "Alright shows over, everybody get the f*ck out. Restaurant's closed"

The customers (including the man's wife) will then charge still screaming towards the door and flee the restaurant

Bobby (investigating the man's body): "He's f*ckin dead Jim"

Jimmy: "Yeah? Serves him f*ckin right stepping to me like that. The f*cking cock sucker"

(To Carlo) "You, help me move this prick's body before the cops come knockin"

Jimmy will grab the man's legs and Carlo will grab his upper body and the two men will carry the body into the restaurant's kitchen. Bobby leading out in front will then knock several foods and ingredients from a large counter in the middle of the kitchen with his massive arms, clearing a space for the other two men to lay the body down.

Bobby: "Ok now we gotta hang him in the freezer until his blood coagulates"

Jimmy: "No we aint got f*ckin time for that. Let's just cut him up here and now and dump the pieces, we can clean up the mess when we're done"

Bobby: "If you say so"

Jimmy will walk over next to the sink and lift up a metal tray filled with butcher's tools and place it on a small serving trolley next to the counter, he will then take out a meat cleaver, a large butcher's knife and a bone saw handing one each to Bobby and Carlo and keeping one for himself. He will then turn on the stereo and "White Rabbit" by Jefferson Airplane will begin to play as Bobby removes the man's clothing. Jimmy will then proceed to remove his own suit jacket placing it on a meat hook by the door and roll up his shirt sleeves in order to prevent them from being stained with blood.

Carlo (looking perplexed at the meat cleaver in his hand): "What the hell am I supposed to do with this?"

Jimmy: "You're gonna help us cut him up, it's gonna take three of us if we want to get this done quickly"

Carlo: "f*ck that, I aint cutting up nobody!"

Jimmy: "Shut up and start cutting"

Carlo: "Nuh uh"

Bobby: "Look Jimmy, If the guy doesn't wanna do it he doesn't have to. We're the professionals here, we can do a much better job on our own"

Jimmy: "Ya know, you do have a point there big guy"

Jimmy will then raise the knife above his head as if he were about to execute a vampire with a stake and plunge it deep into the man's chest before make a large vertical cut down his torso

Carlo (looking a bit nauseous): "I'm just gonna go wait outside"

Carlo will then walk outside the rear of the restaurant and lean on the wall until he regains his composure.

After a time lapse the next scene will cut in showing Carlo pacing back and forth in the alley behind the restaurant. After a few moments the camera will pan to the restaurant's rear door opening and Jimmy and Bobby exiting carrying a thrash bag in each hand. They will then walk to the back of a dark coloured Ingot parked in the adjacent alley and lumber them into the back of it.

Jimmy (to Carlo): "Take these bags and dump them in different locations.. somewhere where they won't be found. Me and Bobby are gonna stay here and clean up"

Carlo: "What about the car"

Bobby: "That piece of sh*t? Dump it in the East River for all I care"

Carlo: "Okay then I'll talk to you two gentlemen later I guess"

Jimmy: "Sure. Just don't f*ck this up okay.. I don't wanna hear that some kid found the guy's prick in a playground"

Carlo: "..I'll make sure that doesn't happen"

Jimmy: "Ok, I'll be in touch"

You will regain control of Carlo inside the car with a way point set for the first dump site located near Colony Island. When you have reached the destination Carlo will park up in the middle of the Leaper's bridge and dump the first of the three bags over the side and into the river before getting back in the car. The second destination will be across the river on the border of Beechwood City beside the airport. When you reach the second destination Carlo will park up beside a gap in the fence, drag the second bag of body parts over to the cliff's edge and dump it off the cliff and into the sea. The third and final dump site will be located on Charge Island. As Carlo pulls up to the final destination he will quip "what is it with these guys and dumping bodies here?" he will then pull up beside another gap in a fence beside the river and dump the last of the gruesome cargo.


A short time after completion of this part of the chapter Carlo will receive a call from Rudy

Carlo: "Hello"

Rudy: "I see you're still alive, I guess you aint talked to Jimmy yet"

Carlo: "No, I talked to Jimmy.. he told me about how you like to wear lady's underwear you faggot f*ck"

Rudy "Now you listen to me you little cock sucker and listen good, I'm gonna find you and I'm gonna f*ckin kill you! And when I see Jimmy I'm gonna f*ckin' kill him too!!

Carlo: "Yeah whatever ya old prick" (hangs up)


Click Here for Part 2

This post has been edited by Money Over Bullshit on Thursday, Oct 18 2012, 23:32

[Claude4Catalina]

why does this not get any damn comments?! I know I've been negligent but seriously this is awesome man! you really do know how to set a perfect scene, I'm not really a fan of fading music into a scene at the right moment though it suited this mission and this concept, really captures the "old gangster flick" essence but pastes it over into 2008 Liberty City. the butchering scene is another classic Mafia movie staple and it was played well to give the protagonist some humanity. nice work man

[Money Over Bullshit]

QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Saturday, Mar 24 2012, 10:20)

why does this not get any damn comments?! I know I've been negligent but seriously this is awesome man!  you really do know how to set a perfect scene, I'm not really a fan of fading music into a scene at the right moment though it suited this mission and this concept, really captures the "old gangster flick" essence but pastes it over into 2008 Liberty City.  the butchering scene is another classic Mafia movie staple and it was played well to give the protagonist some humanity.  nice work man

Thanks a lot for your comment man and your continued support. Any idea when your Papi concept will be unleased on the the forum world?

[akavari112]

I read it too, I just neglected to leave a comment because I'm a lazy ass. Great choice of Jefferson Airplane to set the ambiance while they carve that heckler into deli meat. I hope to see Carlo start busting heads soon, lately it's been a lot of body disposal. Rudy is shaping up to be a background antagonist at this point, but it doesn't seem likely that he'll be killed considering he's still alive in Chinatown Wars. Seeing that Frankie Garone just got whacked somewhere in between these two chapters, the story is taking place somewhere in the middle of Niko's timeline. Will Carlo be working for the Messina Family now?

[Claude4Catalina]

QUOTE (Money Over Bullshit @ Sunday, Mar 25 2012, 14:55)

QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Saturday, Mar 24 2012, 10:20) why does this not get any damn comments?! I know I've been negligent but seriously this is awesome man!  you really do know how to set a perfect scene, I'm not really a fan of fading music into a scene at the right moment though it suited this mission and this concept, really captures the "old gangster flick" essence but pastes it over into 2008 Liberty City.  the butchering scene is another classic Mafia movie staple and it was played well to give the protagonist some humanity.  nice work man Thanks a lot for your comment man and your continued support. Any idea when your Papi concept will be unleased on the the forum world?

not a single clue mate, been writing a Vietnam concept for another part of the forum to see how that goes down and been switching back and forth between the two inbetween work and pub, could do with knuckling down with "All In The Game" (working title). only time will tell.

I agree with akavari, I'd like see Carlo stop chilling and start killing, but for the sake of a decent narrative it seems right to slowly introduce him to playing Grim Reaper rather than placing a Tommy Gun in hand and letting him go to town.

[Money Over Bullshit]

QUOTE (akavari112 @ Sunday, Mar 25 2012, 16:14)

I read it too, I just neglected to leave a comment because I'm a lazy ass. Great choice of Jefferson Airplane to set the ambiance while they carve that heckler into deli meat. I hope to see Carlo start busting heads soon, lately it's been a lot of body disposal. Rudy is shaping up to be a background antagonist at this point, but it doesn't seem likely that he'll be killed considering he's still alive in Chinatown Wars. Seeing that Frankie Garone just got whacked somewhere in between these two chapters, the story is taking place somewhere in the middle of Niko's timeline. Will Carlo be working for the Messina Family now?

Yes Carlo will be working for the Messina Family for a while now (about as long as his tenure with the Pavanos). Carlo will be busting heads again soon but probably not in a way you expect. The downside to him working for all five families is that he almost has to start back at square one each time doing grunt work in order to prove himself to each new employer, his previous jobs for other factions do put him a little bit further up the ladder but reputation can only take a man so far. The killing will really start in the latter part of the next chapter and there will be more indirect crossovers then too so stay tuned.

As regards to Rudy being an antagonist though, that's not really what I was insinuating.. his post mission phone call was really just to act as a precursor to the bad blood between he and Jimmy in Chinatown Wars, however the possibility of him making an attempt on Carlo's life in the future is not out of the question.

@C4C: That vietnam concept sounds very interesting. Have you got any of the story already posted that I can take a look at? If so link me man

[Claude4Catalina]

I've not started a thread yet, got an MS Word doc with all equipment, another with characters and such. intention is to be a third person shooter similar to Max Payne, with the same Rockstar twist of satire, sarcasm and pop culture. there would be three playable characters, a basic Marine grunt that rises the ranks of his platoon, a Force Recon Sergeant and a Navy SEAL in a fireteam. the Marine would be the main focus and all three characters end up tied together in one mission, the SEAL's on a sniping mission/assault on a VC supply village supported by the Marine platoon, whilst the Force Recon squad have to hold off the Viet Cong counter attack from the sticks near the village. the player would go through a simplified basic training and perform patrols (much like how Carlo has to do generic gopher jobs to prove his worth) which would culminate in an attack on a fictional city (I'm using fictional locations based on real life places, for example the city would be similar to the Hue City mock up seen in Full Metal Jacket and simply be part of "North Vietnam). heading back to "South Vietnam" (think Platoon/We Were Soldiers type terrain) the player would have to help defend a Firebase from attack and then form a joint unit with one of the other platoon's in the base, said unit being the support for the SEALs.

[akavari112]

QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 19:27)

I've not started a thread yet, got an MS Word doc with all equipment, another with characters and such. intention is to be a third person shooter similar to Max Payne, with the same Rockstar twist of satire, sarcasm and pop culture. there would be three playable characters, a basic Marine grunt that rises the ranks of his platoon, a Force Recon Sergeant and a Navy SEAL in a fireteam. the Marine would be the main focus and all three characters end up tied together in one mission, the SEAL's on a sniping mission/assault on a VC supply village supported by the Marine platoon, whilst the Force Recon squad have to hold off the Viet Cong counter attack from the sticks near the village. the player would go through a simplified basic training and perform patrols (much like how Carlo has to do generic gopher jobs to prove his worth) which would culminate in an attack on a fictional city (I'm using fictional locations based on real life places, for example the city would be similar to the Hue City mock up seen in Full Metal Jacket and simply be part of "North Vietnam). heading back to "South Vietnam" (think Platoon/We Were Soldiers type terrain) the player would have to help defend a Firebase from attack and then form a joint unit with one of the other platoon's in the base, said unit being the support for the SEALs.

That sounds pretty cool. I had a similar idea for a Call of Duty: Vietnam, but where can you even post something like that around here?

[Claude4Catalina]

damn right, ignoring the Cold War Fight Club time travel mess that was Black Ops, Vietnam hasnt been represented in the CoD series...

I posed the same question a few weeks ago and apparently Gaming Chat is the best place to post...makes sense seeing as if we were blessed with a Non GTA Concept subforum it'd get spammed with half arsed "CodMod4" bullsh*t.

[akavari112]

QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 21:29)

damn right, ignoring the Cold War Fight Club time travel mess that was Black Ops, Vietnam hasnt been represented in the CoD series... I posed the same question a few weeks ago and apparently Gaming Chat is the best place to post...makes sense seeing as if we were blessed with a Non GTA Concept subforum it'd get spammed with half arsed "CodMod4" bullsh*t.

I'd love a separate forum for all types of game concepts. I always wanted to write one for the free roam zombie apocalypse I always fantasize about. Maybe I'll give it a shot in my spare time.

[Money Over Bullshit]

QUOTE (akavari112 @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 22:39)

QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 21:29) damn right, ignoring the Cold War Fight Club time travel mess that was Black Ops, Vietnam hasnt been represented in the CoD series... I posed the same question a few weeks ago and apparently Gaming Chat is the best place to post...makes sense seeing as if we were blessed with a Non GTA Concept subforum it'd get spammed with half arsed "CodMod4" bullsh*t. I'd love a separate forum for all types of game concepts. I always wanted to write one for the free roam zombie apocalypse I always fantasize about. Maybe I'll give it a shot in my spare time.

Me too.. I don't personally have any ideas for a non GTA related concept but it would be cool to have a place for others to post such topics. I've always felt that this section wasn't exactly the best place for concept topics but there doesn't seem to be anywhere else on the forum that's more suitable so it is what it is I guess.

[SWOT]

QUOTE (Money Over Bullsh*t @ Tuesday, Apr 3 2012, 00:33)

QUOTE (akavari112 @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 22:39) QUOTE (Claude4Catalina @ Tuesday, Mar 27 2012, 21:29) damn right, ignoring the Cold War Fight Club time travel mess that was Black Ops, Vietnam hasnt been represented in the CoD series... I posed the same question a few weeks ago and apparently Gaming Chat is the best place to post...makes sense seeing as if we were blessed with a Non GTA Concept subforum it'd get spammed with half arsed "CodMod4" bullsh*t. I'd love a separate forum for all types of game concepts. I always wanted to write one for the free roam zombie apocalypse I always fantasize about. Maybe I'll give it a shot in my spare time. Me too.. I don't personally have any ideas for a non GTA related concept but it would be cool to have a place for others to post such topics. I've always felt that this section wasn't exactly the best place for concept topics but there doesn't seem to be anywhere else on the forum that's more suitable so it is what it is I guess.

I agree M.OB. In fact, if u ask me we should suggest that a separate section of this forum be devoted primarily to concept threads.

EDIT link

This post has been edited by SWOT on Sunday, Apr 15 2012, 10:16