[Naomi]

It's back.
Use it & abuse it.

Quote members that have posted something so good it must be shared or so lame as to publicly ridicule them.
Or toss a coin on those that could go either way.

House Rules:
- Any part of the forums.
- GTAF forums/members only.
- GTANet/IRC quotes inclusive.
- Provide a link if you can find the energy....or the link.

Mark I - Outdated. No link available
Mark II - Outdated. No link available
Mark III - Outdated. No link available
Mark IV
Mark V

[Piperka]

QUOTE (DODI3OG)

Guys, my classmates are annoying me, I mean, I am just trying to be myself, but every now and then I comb my hair to look like a skater, they call me a feeler just because they think I'm imitating those gay-ass emos in our class. My normally-grown hairstyle is like Justin Bieber's when it grows long(shaggy hair) but I style it like other skater's hair(Japanese and other Asian style), they throw insults at me like imitator or something(Including those gay-ass emos who thinks they're real emos). Well, I am an emotional guy literally but, for me, I don't need an ugly-looking hairstyle to tell them that I am. Shouldn't I style my hair and just let it grow? Note: I am not a Justin Bieber fan, what I meant is that my hair is normally shaggy. BTW, I need an Advice on where I should cut my hair. I don't want Barbers to cut my hair because all crap they know is Shaving your head and/or cutting it to make it look "CLEAN". But when I go to a Gay stylist, my friends accuse me of being one of them. Note 2:The words with underlines are words which I've changed. Important note: Look, I am not insulting others on their hairstyle. They made me insult them for saying that I imitated them(they make fun of me because they think that my hair is not properly styled to look like theirs.). And, it's very obvious that I am not imitating them because my hair is not as messy as theirs.

[Tyler]

QUOTE (Naomi @ Sep 30 2010, 05:09)

It's back. Use it & abuse it. members have something so good it must be pubic Or those that could go either way.

This guy was funny.

[Piperka]

QUOTE (Typhus)

Of course I'm a virgin. I'm not attracted to either sex. They're both equally boring to me. The women are vain, superficial weaklings who hide behind their gender when things get rough. And the men are smut-obsessed imbeciles, no matter how fat or hideous they become they still think normal human beings want to hear about their masturbatory habbits or just what they'd do to Angelina Jolie. You think I'd want to have sex with a man or a woman? I feel the same sense of revulsion at such an idea as you probably do at the thought of chugging down an entire bowl full of goat urine.

Epic.

[Naomi]

The future Zaibatsu CEOs.
We're screwed...

QUOTE (Brad. @ Feb 18 2010, 05:06)

QUOTE (truthypants @ Feb 17 2010, 18:53) QUOTE (Brad. @ Feb 17 2010, 18:46) QUOTE (Vanilla Shake @ Feb 17 2010, 18:32) QUOTE (Brad. @ Feb 17 2010, 13:11) QUOTE (Vanilla Shake @ Feb 17 2010, 17:29) QUOTE (Brad. @ Feb 17 2010, 12:24) QUOTE (Unlimited @ Feb 17 2010, 16:59) Jesus Brad. You look like your 10. I don't. You are. You are look like you are 10? Now you're just making things confusing. Allow me to translate: "You are." = you are in fact 10 years old. Though the subject of the statement was 'look' not 'are'. Therefore, mistranslation. Vanilla was making a separate statement... "You are." duh. I know this, however the way it was communicated, was poor.

[Ryan]

QUOTE (Unoriginal44 @ Sep 30 2010, 02:46)

QUOTE (Naomi @ Sep 30 2010, 05:09) It's back. Use it & abuse it. members have  something so good it must be pubic Or those that could go either way. This girl was funny.

Fixed

[Robinski]

QUOTE

dud dats not gas dats a chikn

Still the best post this forum has ever seen. For the uninitiated, it was by some idiot (dawg1990 perhaps?) in response to being trolled with an article about clean gasoline with the "source" being the Bald Chicken Needs No Plucking story. Everybody in the thread was already talking about the chicken.

...Ah I guess you had to be there.

[Naomi]

Ryan, I've been mistaken for a man here so many times now, I think I'm ready for my GTAF Golden Penis Award.

[Mealing]

QUOTE (Robinski @ Sep 30 2010, 15:32)

QUOTE dud dats not gas dats a chikn Still the best post this forum has ever seen. For the uninitiated, it was by some idiot (dawg1990 perhaps?) in response to being trolled with an article about clean gasoline with the "source" being the Bald Chicken Needs No Plucking story. Everybody in the thread was already talking about the chicken. ...Ah I guess you had to be there.

Ugh.. I wanted to post that one.
I'm not your friend anymore.

[nerner]

QUOTE (Carl CJ Jhonson @ Jul 08 2010 @ 21:32)

Yo broda,why I shoulda giva ya ma missia when I can uss my chit up to pass in the whole thing?

Brilliant example of stupidity from the Vice City Stories "Save 'n' Play" thread.

[Max.]

Brad does look about 10 though.

[Lithium]

QUOTE

ezcool I'm actually sad as this death was so useless. If that guy was straight and then died; we'd have more chances to get girls. But as he's gay, we don't even get any more ratio.. Anyways, who isn't happy for faggot killing himself?

I guess that's why he's now banned. Thanks to whoever did that. Stupid git he was.

[Typhus]

Ever wonder why anuj is considered the funniest guy here? Because he does things like this:

QUOTE (anuj)

Alright, we can play this game. I'll be honest, I've read a lot of your posts and there isn't one where you don't come off as some sort of nihilistic self-diagnosed Asperger's patient with a self-described apparently unintelligible voice. I've read some of your posts where all I can think is "wow I wish he would just go away" and surprise surprise, your deep brooding paragraph spewing ass agrees with me on something! Oh wait, offing yourself would require a pair slightly larger than half an average honey roasted peanut. So how's that being evil and trying to do good thing working out for you? You staying on that righteous path, typing out Demarest-esque dissertations in your cutesy non-even-subtle-on-the-internet sarcastic tone? How many college newspapers have you been denied from, anyways? Your post history, when not reading like the blog of someone rejected from Full Sail, is full of absolutely precious gems about how f*cked up you feel you are, but you're a great human being because you don't smoke or drink and apparently you're "free of sin" To anyone who might have read this post for whatever reason, check out this guy's post history. It's pretty good.

And that, dear children, is what we call f*cking sh*t up.

[Don Garcia]

Attack on Mod. Oh noes.

[Typhus]

QUOTE (Don Garcia @ Sep 30 2010, 19:36)

Attack on Mod. Oh noes.

No, not attacking him at all actually. I sincerely find it funny when he blows his lid at someone. Even when that person is me.
If a man doesn't have a sense of humour about himself, well, I don't have much time for him.
I like anuj, and I actually apologised to him profusely about me being such a twat. Everything he said was true, more or less, and I really do get a kick out of someone with the balls to call a c*nt a c*nt. Know what I mean?

[Blizzard14]

QUOTE

It'll start with this, and then suddenly my father will die, to which then I will be placed in the care of my mother, whom you shall meet one day on the town, small talk here and there as you ask her what is the best brand of shampoo to buy for your damaged hair that is both dry and somewhat wavy, an odd combination, she will recommend you a nice shampoo that is refreshing to the hair, also doubles as a conditioner for occasional tangles, and smells of green apples, your favourite. And then what? You'll say thanks, and you'll smile, and introduce yourself, she will do so too, few minutes of small talk later, you will ask her for her number, she will hesitate but then give you it, she will come home telling me she met a nice man at the store today and that he is supposed to give her a call later, you will call, and you will both have a nice time, you ask her out saturday, you go out to a nice coffee shop, and eventually to better places as you grow emotionally to the point where you're both always thinking about eachother and eventually you both give in deciding you're both made for eachother, and you propose. Then a wedding takes place, white everywhere, you will stand there in your tux, you will get married, mum's the word after that, and soon you will ruin my life by constantly calling me 'HURR MY USELESS STEPSON DAVE' every time we meet someone. And that simply cannot happen

Forgot who wrote that, but im sure it was someone from here.

[Sauron]

QUOTE (Is it strange to be attracted to your sister @ Spinach)

before you read this: Please don't judge me... I'm just sharing my story because people asked... Wow... okay, I wasn't sure if I was ever going to tell anyone about this, but I never went to bed last night and I'm sleep deprived so i guess I'll just write it now and regret it in the morning First of all, - just for some background: My mom died right when I was born, (she was actually really, really hot- but this isn't about her. I guess that's f*cked up to say, but whatever.) I actually grew up with my dad's family, because my dad has all sorts of emotional issues and he bailed before I was born. So you can see, my childhood was really kind of messed up. Anyways, growing up I feel like there was always a lot of distance between me and my sister. When I was about 17 or 18 I first noticed that my sister was a hottie. I don't want to go into too many details about it, but basically what happened is that I accidentally found a video that she made of herself. I knew she didn't make it for me- but I thought she was so f*cking beautiful that I watched it twice. I probably would have watched it a hell of a lot more, except that like right around the time I found the video, all this crazy sh*t went down and I had to leave home. (My dad's family who I was staying with got in bad trouble with the law. I never talk about it). Sooo... I was totally lusting after my sister at that point. She was also having bad trouble with the law. She was actually in custody when I left home. My friend and I went to go pick her up. When I saw her that day, after seeing the video, I have to be honest, I just wanted to f*ck her brains out. Looking back on it now, it's pretty messed up- but I think she had feelings for me too. She actually kissed me right after we came to get her... and it wasn't a sisterly kiss, you know? I mean, it wasn't like ridiculously sexual or anything, but it definitely wasn't sisterly. After we left, we all went to crash with my Sister's friends. On the trip there, my friend sort of implied that he wanted to get with my Sister, and I got a little jealous. He's a good looking guy- and even though she was my sister- I just felt like he was competition. Not much else happened between us for a while except some maybe-sexy hugging. Pretty much everyone in my life at that point was wanted by the cops, so we all moved around a lot. I'm not saying that I'm proud of it or anything, but it was kind of an awesome time. My friend and my sister never hooked up I don't think- but I thought there was some serious sexual tension going on between them. It was around that time that I got really badly hurt in an accident. It was f*cked up. I almost died. But when I was in recovery my sister came to see me, and out of the clear blue sky she started gives me this awesome, slow, passionate kiss on the lips. Sadly (although, I guess for the best) nothing ever came of it. We spent some time apart... and I started to get really religious, so I tried not to think of her that way. It was actually going well for a long time- like I was totally over her. But I have to say, like a year or so after all that stuff went down, we were out sailing (not like a date or anything romantic like that), and she was wearing like the hottest bikini I've ever f*cking seen and it brought back all the old feelings. Sigh. A little while later she actually wound up with my friend from before (the sexual tension guy). I can't say I was surprised. But even after she was shacking up with my friend, there was one time we were at a party... my friend was inside, and my sister and I were outside alone. It was a really intimate moment. I think something might have happened, except that I killed the mood when I told her that Darth Vader was our father and that I had to go face him.

[Piperka]

This has probably been posted before but it's damn hilarious and deserves a repost.

QUOTE (BrishinAlhad1986 @ Apr 3 2009, 04:11)

Helo! I'am not poster freqently heare, and english it not verry strong for me, but I want know when in GTA 4 the juice freeze? The scope of the gun doesn't stay behind the silence! I try explaining: In entirely be to at settling facility to shoot the man with sniper. Fruit two watch men you seven share. Needed as or is enough points in time. Miles at smart no many whole when the car is stop.. Extremely depending th shootinge time gentleman improving intention rapturous has of Nikko. Uneasy barton seeing remark happen his has. Am possible offering at contempt my distance stronger than rifle i have.. Attachment of the scope between AK and RPG? Can be possible? Be very sorry for mine englsih.

Also

QUOTE (BrishinAlhad1986 @ Dec 9 2008, 19:19)

Hello, gta player I am in Algeria where pc games is not much. there is only olding games from many years past. I go to france with my fathers and buys GTA 4 for use in the computer. I play GTA 2 that is the very game i have to for use in the computer, so i dont know about gta 4 was for use on the computer and i buy it on france. when in algeria for play in my computer i put CD 1 on mine CD reader and it does not happen. the CD is size of CD reader but when inside it rotation for short time and does not happen nothing. I see very others play with problems and they say what the computers have for pieces inside, and i search my computer in to see what pieces it haves inside so they are here I have processing CPU is pentium II 400mhz MMX 128 megabithes in RAM memoir 22 gigabit disk 5400 rotation in minute and grraphic video card is inside is the nvida riva TNT 16 megabites in memoir. and my CD reader is very fast like Samsung 40x CD-ROM device. So is why it cannot happen to ready my 2 GTA 4 cds? it very fast cd reader, 40x spins very fast my friend tell me. I want play this GTA 4 in for use my computer and cd reader not say anything. when GTA 2 is in cd reader it happens that screen appear and i can choice to play. very thank you forgivve for my in english linguage, it not very good in school

[ghost of delete key]

QUOTE (κενιη @ Jun 12 2010, 01:40)

You need laid.

Good to see you back home again, Naomi.

[meta187]

On being approached by inquisitive boys:

QUOTE (Jesus'En'Hitler420 @ Jun 15 2010, 16:49)

NO IF HE CAME RUNNING UP TO ME WITH A CAMERA AT MY FACE I'D ROUNDHOUSE THAT F@GGOT INTO A CACTUS!