[vertical limit]

yo mama is like an arcade game, everyone gets a turn.

[DatassGTA]

A man and a little girl are walking through a dark forest, the little girl turns to the man and says "I'm scared" the man says "Your scared?! I'm the one who has to walk back alone!"

I asked a pretty, young, homeless woman if I could take her home, and she said yes with a big smile. The look on her face soon changed when I walked off with her cardboard box.

I locked my keys in my car outside of an abortion clinic the other night. It turns out they get really pissed when you go in and ask them for a coat hanger.

my lesbia­n neighbors asked me what i wanted for my birthday...they gave me a rolex, i guess they misunderstood when i said "i wanna watch"

Why did Amy drop her ice cream? Because she was hit by a bus.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Not Amy.

A priest, a rabbi, and a horse walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, a joke?

A man walks into a bar, and realizes his alcoholism is destroying his family.

[lil weasel]

What did the short stool say to the tall chair?
Hi, Chair!

What did the beetle say to the windscreen?
That's me all over!

What did the Calf say to the Silo?
Is my fodder in there?

[Mealing]

What did the retard say to his dog?

HRRAAHGHHH HANYAAA NYURRRRRR!!!!111!

[BrentD15]

What do you call a racist joke?
Bad Taste.

[vertical limit]

How many Jews did Hitler kill?
Not Enough


How long does it take for a black woman to take a sh*t?
9 months


Whats the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew?
Harry Potter escaped the chambers


Whats the difference between a Mexican and a printer?
A printer has its papers

[Mr.Funny12]

You know what they say, when a Polock throws a grenade at you what do you do?

Pull the pin and throw it back.

[vertical limit]

What do you call a white man with a big dick?
Michael Jackson.

[TinTinn]

How was the Grand Canyon formed?

A Jew dropped a nickel down a gopher hole.

[BrentD15]

How many Nazis did the Russians kill?
Not enough.

[AtomicPunk]

Ollie was a wrestler in highschool and had a big wrestling competition coming up and his opponent was known for inventing a move called 'The Octopus Hold' and no one has ever escaped from it.
As soon as the match started, he got Ollie in the octopus hold.
Ollie was embarrassed because for the first time his dad come to watch him wrestle and he didn't want to lose. He looked up and saw a pair of nuts hangin' down......So he bit'em!
He got out of the octopus hold--the first time that it had ever been broken and his coach came running up and asked " How the hell did you get out of that? This is unbelievable!"
Ollie said "well, I looked up and saw this set of nuts and I bit'em! You wouldn't believe the energy you get when you bite yourself in the nuts!"

Ollie Joe Prater
?-1991

[lil weasel]

Why do transvestites love Christmas?
Because it's a time to Eat, Drink, and be Mary!

[BrentD15]

In WW2 Germany, YOU try to take over WORLD.
In Cold War Germany, WORLD try to take over YOU.

[lil weasel]

What do you call a Dog without legs?

Call it what ever you want because it ain't going to come to you anyway.

[IM_YOUR_GOD]

What happens when you put Bush and Dick together?


Your going to get f*cked

[Jack.]

why are black people so tall? cause there KNEE-GROWS.

[finn4life]

[lil weasel]

What's Black and White, red all over, and crawls through the grass.

a mugged Nun

[pcguytech]

Two guys are in a locker room when one guy notices the other guy has a cork stuck in his butt. He says " How'd you get a cork stuck in your butt man!? That's jammed to the rim. " The other guy says, I was walking along the beach and I tripped over a lamp. There was a puff of smoke, and then a white man in a turban came oozing out. He said, "I am Tuki, Arabian Genie, I can grant you one wish." And I said, "No sh*t."

[Hodgey1989]

Gerry and Kate have mentioned that there will be a spare place at the dinner table this Christmas. Well, let me tell you, if there had been a spare place at that f*cking tapas restaurant you'd probably still have a daughter!