[deepthroatgta6]

Me and my girlfriend are going through a hard time in convincing her parents to let her marry me. (That's how it is to be done here in India when you fall in love with a person of another caste or religion).

She was staying depressed all the time and so I thought of doing something to shake her out of it by giving her something else to think of.
I had been hiding from her some facts about me like I smoke tobacco. Weed and alcohol occasionally. I don't know why I hid such simple things from her for as long as a year. I just didn't want her to dislike me. I know that was wrong on my part.

So before a few days, while we were chatting, I suddenly told her everything about it. She was too hurt. She didn't mind any of those things but she could not accept that I had been hiding and lying for so long.

Before four years, when we had started dating, I had done the same thing. She was a close friend back then and I was interested in her as well as another girl. I used to lie to her to meet that another girl. I was 17 at that time. She forgave me for all the lies and that's when I realized that she was the girl with whom I can be happy.

After being inseparable for so many years, she is finding it hard to trust me anymore and is compelled to rethink about me. She is not able to break up with me because she loves me too much but at the same time, she can't be what she was to me a week ago.

I tried to gain a healthy conscience by confessing everything to her but never realized the other guilt I would acquire after having hid things from her for so long. I really am sorry. I have tried and have only managed to be repetitive about how much I feel sorry for what I did and how much we need to be together. I know she needs time to think and I don't want to harass her by my repetitive pleading to give us a last chance but I can't just let her go and so I keep texting her again and again. I don't want to lose her nor do I want her to lose me. I know what I meant to her and I don't want us to suffer. I have been repeatedly promising her that I will always be honest to her. She finds it tough to trust me even though she wants to.

Working and studying has been hard since this happened and I am also getting frustrated at the situation and me. I know that all I can do is give her time to think.

Anyone been through anything like this? Broke anyone's trust twice and yet got a chance?

[Prominent Fate]

Usually I wouldn't do this, but I feel as if I need to have a rant and a talk on how I feel to people who won't judge.

My first issue recently is how me and my mother had a really big fall-out. I chose my best friend over her and didn't go home for three days whilst we stayed out. After so, I ended up walking out again after she kept on going on at me about past events that had already been resolved within the house. She told me that she'd phone the police and get me put into foster care despite knowing that my father (they split up when I was three) would never let that happen as he'd take me in (which he did). I went home today and basically, we started arguing over the phone because she wouldn't let me get my belongings from my bedroom in her house. I feel angry but sad. Angry because how she's treated me in the past and recently and relieved that I'm out of there but sad because after all, it is my mum. I feel like I don't want to see her but at the same time can't live without her. I act as if I'm not sad, but I really am.

The second issue is a girl I've liked for almost a year now (in love with) is dating my best friend. When I see them together my heart crushes. Recently they haven't been seeing eachother as much and I've been going out with her and her brother. Every day for the past month I've been with her, and everytime I look at her I look straight into her eyes, which isn't like me. It's hard, really hard.